1. The Cinnamon Challenge
OBJECTIVE: Swallow a tablespoon of ground cinnamon within 60 seconds.
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: The cinnamon is so drying that it’ll zap all your spit immediately and you’ll start choking so you won’t be able to breathe, let alone swallow. Also, it could maybe kill you.
3. The Gallon Challenge
OBJECTIVE: Drink an entire gallon of milk in one hour without vomiting.
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: Devilish because it sounds so EASY and then halfway through you start to realize that the average human stomach holds maybe half a gallon, max, and then you start to feel deep, worrying pain, and then you barf all over everything.
5. The Banana + Sprite Challenge
OBJECTIVE: Eat two bananas and drink a liter of Sprite without vomiting.
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: Supposedly this is hard because a Mysterious Chemical Reaction between the bananas and the Sprite (akin to Mentos/Coke) creates an irresistible urge to blow chunks, but in reality it’s probably just your tiny human stomach and its puny ol’ capacity.
6. The Peeps Challenge
OBJECTIVE: Traditionally, eat 24 peeps in 5 minutes. World record: 25 peeps in 30 seconds (WHAT?).
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: No no, really, if repeatedly prying your jaws apart once they’ve been glued together with an agglomerated mass of marshmallow goo and crunchy neon sugar sounds like your idea of a good time, by all means proceed.
7. Chubby Bunny
OBJECTIVE: Stuff as many marshmallows as possible into your mouth, without swallowing, while repeating the phrase “chubby bunny” (acceptable variant: “fluffy bunny”).
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: Sort of like the Peeps Challenge except so, so much worse because the marshmallows never go away, plus the added humiliation of Hodor-esque word repetition, plus the fact that it only ends when you give up for fear of drowning in your own saliva. Plus the fact that A CHILD DIED DOING THIS.
9. The Ghost Pepper Challenge
OBJECTIVE: Chew and swallow an entire ghost pepper (aka naga or bhut jolokia chili), generally referred to as the world’s hottest pepper. Or three of them. Ideally without vomiting, sobbing, or otherwise embarrassing yourself in a public arena.
WHY IT’S A BAD IDEA: No reason, really, except the distinct feeling of your entire body being consumed by hellfire.