Let's face it: Some people just suck. They activate the hater in us, and it can feel good to vent about them instead of bottling it up. That's what I learned when u/lawyeratyourservice asked people, "Who's your 'I fucking hate this guy' guy?"
There were lots of heated responses about all genders, so here are the stories about jerks that stood out the most:
1. "My thirtysomething neighbor. We share a property line with this clown. I planted a row of lilac bushes almost 25 years ago, and he wants me to take them out because he says 'they block the sun' from his garden. The lilacs are planted well on our side of the property line, but he thinks that his back fence was built 2 feet into his property and that the lilacs are really on his property. This has been going on for over three years, so I shelled out $3,000 for a survey, and lo and behold, the property line is exactly where I thought is was: 3 feet from my lilac hedge. A fence is being erected as soon as the ground thaws. Fuck him!"
2. "I used to work as a receptionist for an obstetrician, and there was a patient’s husband whom we all loathed. He called his wife a fat cow in front of the nurse. When she was in the hospital having her ninth baby and needed an emergency C-section, they had to get security involved because her husband was blocking the door to prevent them from taking her to the operating room. He refused to let her have a hysterectomy even though she had a lot of medical issues that could have been resolved by that. She didn’t legally need his permission, but they were Amish, so she 'submitted' to him. He made her try for a vaginal delivery after a C-section even though it was more risky. He wouldn’t let her take insulin for her gestational diabetes. I came to the conclusion that he was trying to make her die without actually pulling the trigger physically. He was an absolute monster, and I still think about her and wonder if she’s okay."
"Six years later, I still remember her name."
3. "My husband’s sister is married to the biggest asshole I’ve ever met. She works as a nurse, and he pretty much lives off of her salary. She sees it as 'taking care of him,' but we all see how he clearly takes advantage of her. She’ll work all day while he stays home with their dog, yet the house is always a mess when she comes home. And he still expects her to cook dinner. One time, she made him a breakfast sandwich at her parents' house, and he complained because she 'used Kraft cheese and put it on a paper plate.' He'll gaslight the shit out of her, talk down to her, or call her stupid because she’s not as 'passionate' about politics as he is."
4. "A classmate in college. We were in this class where we were asked to form groups to work together throughout the year. My group was missing one member, and I decided to invite a lonely guy who was reading a book. He was a good group member and did a good job. The problem was that he was a dick. He'd film people with his phone during class, then post it on his Instagram to make fun of them, like when he posted a story of some person who kept stroking their beard in class. The worst offense: For our last assignment, we had to write a script. I wrote one and he didn't like it because it was 'too Disney.' I was taking another class and didn't have time to write another one, so I asked him to write his own. The jerk wrote characters based on us!"
5. "The person who abruptly stops walking in the middle of a hallway or sidewalk. Or has their neck completely craned over their phone and is walking at two steps per minute. I know I’m American and the stereotype is that we’re all rushing around because we're busy, but seriously, pick up the pace."
"I have long legs and places to be."
6. "My ex-boss was a colossal dick. You know the type — the one who is always right even when they're not, passes you any work they deem too hard, and has this mentality that you are some kind of computer-controlled drone who exists to telepathically know what they need and when because you're designed to serve them. He had this belief that everything could only be done right if it was done his way. Anything else was faulty, even if it was done properly as dictated by the client."
7. "My middle school algebra teacher. I got my period at the beginning of class, and she refused to let me go to the bathroom. I bled all over myself for over an hour and had to wear bloody clothes the rest of the day. Fuck you, Mrs. Lynn."
"I didn’t tell her what had happened because I was very young and embarrassed by the whole thing. Still, the idea of denying students the right to go to the bathroom when required is insane."
8. "A few years ago, my friends and I were partying at a nightclub in New York. Some random guy kept coming up to us and tried to dance on us all night. It wasn’t aggressive, sexual, or anything, it was just…I don’t know. I guess he thought we would let him join our group? At one point I thought I was dancing with my best friend, but when I turned around, it was actually the guy dancing on me from behind. My girlfriend pushed him away and we continued our night. Trying to dance with us like we’d been friends for five years was weird."
9. "Any dude whose personality revolves around being 'alpha.'"
10. "My best friend moved to a different state, met a guy, and quickly got engaged. She brought him to meet us, and he told me how much he made within the first 10 minutes. Then he asked what I made and scoffed at the amount. He went on to say he would never live in my apartment because we didn't have an elevator, and he would never be caught dead driving in a car like mine. He followed that up with the fact that he buys new cars every two years. He talked over my friend constantly. I would ask her a question and he would answer for her. He complained about the amount of money she made and made fun of her job. She's a social worker who works with underage girls who have eating disorders. He styles his mustache to do that pretentious curl thing with wax. Fuck that guy."
11. "The suit guy from Train to Busan. It's been a while since a movie made me actually hate someone, but that dude was another level."
12. "I used to work as a receptionist for an eye doctor, and there was this one dude I always needed to call, and he never answered his phone. I'd be calling to confirm an appointment, ask a question about an order, or remind him to pick up his glasses, and he just wouldn't pick up. The problem was his voicemail: It was two minutes of him acting as if he couldn't hear you: 'Hello? Hello? I can't hear you...," and then him eventually saying, 'Just text me' before I finally heard the beep to record a voicemail. I fell for it the first time because he did a genuinely convincing job. Every other time, I had to sit through this long-ass voicemail to be able to actually leave a message. I bet this idiot thought he was sooo clever, and didn't even consider that someone other than his friends would call. No, I cannot 'just text' you from the vision center's landline."
13. "My brother's uncle. I refuse to claim him. He put my grandparents through hell. Some of the gems he said to his mother's face: 'Why don't you just give me my inheritance now?' 'Why would I want to ruin my Christmas Eve by spending it with you?' Then, once she died, it was, 'Oh, boo-hoo...' He swore he'd put family first. He then proceeded to treat my grandfather like shit. And because Grandpa lived with me, I saw it firsthand. He would say he was coming over on Sunday, so Grandpa would be up at the crack of dawn ready to go and would be sitting watching out the window like a kid who has divorced parents and is waiting for his dad to show up for his weekend. He would sit there all day and then be heartbroken when the fucker didn't show up and never called. Listening to my grandfather cry because he was so upset made me see red."
"Then, once Grandpa died, it was all, 'Boo-hoo, poor me' all over again. Since both of my grandparents were now gone, I ripped into him and told him exactly what I thought of him. That was 13 years ago, and it still wasn't enough for me."
14. "A former high school teammate was just a huge jerk to everyone. What pissed me off the most was that his Instagram stories would be about how 'God wants you to be a really nice person,' even though he was a complete jackass in real life. He had it out for me specifically from the day we met. He's the only dude on this planet I genuinely hate."
15. "Anyone with that stupid broccoli haircut, where it’s short on the sides but curly on the top. They’re an asshole 99% of the time."
16. "I have a coworker who constantly talks over people, refuses to think she's ever wrong, and is just all-around obnoxious. I mean, I can get along with pretty much anyone, so it's pretty bad when someone makes me as angry as she does. There have been times when I've had to walk out into the hallway after interacting with her and let out a whispered scream because if I don't, I'm afraid I'm gonna go into a white-hot rage and punch her right in the mouth. And the kicker is, she thinks she and I are besties!"
"She literally tells everyone I'm one of her favorite coworkers — I don't know why, because I can barely have a conversation with her without combusting from annoyance."