4. No matter how much blanket rolling and tucking you do, it’s still freezing in your house.
7. Speaking of horror movies, you get the worst nosebleeds.
The air is too damn dry.
8. The nose issues alone are enough to annihilate your will to live.
You don’t have a cold and yet the snot runs freely whenever you’re outside.
10. Ironically, the heat in your car never seems to kick in until you’re already at your destination.
19. Considering the amount of alcohol you drink during the winter to cope, you may as well just be in a coma.
And avoid that whole hungover part.
20. You’ve managed to store an ample amount of fat and blubber on your bones.
Proof that humans were designed to hibernate during the winter.
21. There isn’t really much going on in your life anyway.
No one will notice if they don’t see you for two months.
22. All the good TV will be back on the air when you finally wake up.
You’ve had just about enough of this whole mid-winter finale business.
23. You’re just about ready to start complaining about how hot it is.
Bring on the mosquitoes and swamp ass because you are ready for winter to be OVER.