You recently graduated from college/universityYou've been asked at least once "what's next?"You've been asked at least five timesYou've been asked so many times that it's hard to control your facial expressions when someone asksYou still aren't sure that it's all ACTUALLY done yetYou have nightmares of group projectsOf papersOf sleepless nights because JARED couldn't put his share of contribution into the assignmentYou've applied to so many post-grad jobs you've lost countYou get told at least once a day that "everything will work out"You also get asked at least once a day if you've even been applying for jobsYou buy avocados instead of houses, you millennial trashYou use student discounts still cause you're in denialYou sometimes wonder when it's no longer acceptable to eat KD as a mealYou'd rather just invite people over instead of going to your typical bars because you feel oldAlso youths are annoyingYou've actually turned into an old manYou've accepted that you might actually have to start adulting nowYou wonder how adults make friendsPeople around you are consistently getting engaged and having kidsYou wonder if your degree/diploma/certificate was the right one to getNO JANET I STILL DON'T HAVE A REAL JOB YET OKAYYou blow through entire Netflix series in a day because you have nothing better to doYou've started looking at Master's programs because you already miss schoolAlso because it might be better to take on more debt instead of facing adulthoodBut you got a C- in that one elective so you're limited to where will accept youYou're dreading that 6 month mark because you'll have to start paying back your student loansYou wonder if the government will accept IOUsYou wonder why entry level jobs require 5 years of experienceYou wonder why you couldn't have just invented the next Facebook and gotten super richWhile you sit and eat a pint of ice cream to yourselfIt's kind of rad not having to have all that responsibility anymoreLike hey maybe you can finally learn to play the guitarLearn a new languageOr get a dogWho are you kidding, you're gonna just keep watching NetflixAnd probably sleep in until 11But then the dread of adulting sets in, maybe you start getting up at 8 insteadAnd then you eventually get an adult job (LOL who trusts you with that kind of responsibility)And hey you'll probably hang around campus as THAT alumnae memberBut it's fine, this is what someone who's $50k in debt does right?You realize that you are already out of touch with what is "cool"Everyone is already starting to move onAnd move awaySo you start worrying that you'll end up forever alone, in debtBut you start thinking of all the memories you made in your time in schoolAnd how this is just another chapter of your lifeSo maybe things aren't so bad after allHaving an adult job means you can probably afford to fly to visit all the friends who moved awayAnd hey, getting a degree/diploma/certificate is a pretty big accomplishmentYou actually have a sense of pride for yourselfMaybe adulting isn't so bad#patiobeers to avoid responsibilityHey now you can actually focus on losing the freshman 15Which was more like freshman 40 but who's counting?Okay it was like the entire degree weight gainYou're in a state of unknownBut everyone in your shoes feels the sameSo you can breathe a little better that nobody really actually knows what they are doingAnd hey, you made a ton of lasting friendships.
Are You Actually A Recent Graduate?
Do you even go here? Okay maybe you still go here? Where is here? We have a lot of unanswered questions, but that's okay, you'll get there one day. Keep pushing. But enjoy the ride.
Oh you poor lost soul. It's okay, things do actually get better - or so we've heard. The cool thing about being graduated though is you can actually go be a real adult - which hear us out sounds scary AF, but you will be making mad stacks eventually. Until then, go have a drink, and be in a sweet state of denial that it's over now (unless grad school?) my child.