Holidays When Your Divorced

This does not have to be a dreaded time .

:)

Holidays When Your Divorced

Crap, whose week will Christmas fall on this year? That is the first thought that crosses divorced peoples mind. That should not be the most important thought in our head , but let’s face it we all love our kids and want to know where they will spending the holidays.

I want to encourage you to do what ever needs to be done so that your kids do not fall victim in chaos of your thoughts. I will be honest the holidays is one of the only times my ex and I are on the same page. Christmas is suppose to be the most joyful time of the year and our kids do not deserve to have their joy taken away because of our problems.

First thing I would encourage you to do is discuss the holidays as early as August that way any misunderstandings that are going to come up will have time to blow over . I have found out it works well . At first , there may be someone arguing but I promise by October you will have it compromised because both of you will be tired of arguing .

Second thing is make sure you are being as fair as possible. You know you want to be treated fairly . The bible does say treat others the way you want to be treated. I try so hard to teach this to my kids so if I am not leading by example what kind of mother am I ? What I mean is you know of all the family traditions that your ex other half does year after year and vise versa with you . You guys should sit down as a team and decide how you will make it possible not to take any traditions away from the kids. Because let’s face it, this was their normal Christmas until you two could not make it work for what ever reason.

Lastly , make sure you save face! No matter how heart broken you are with the outcome of the agreement , do not let your kids no it upsets you in anyway. Remember they can tell when something is wrong with you and this will steal their joy. These sweet babies already feel like they are being pulled to take sides , so we as parents should make sure they never sense any resentment toward you and your partner.

I want to make the holidays as enjoyable for my kids as possible . They do not deserve any less. Christmas is a magical time for young children and I would never want to steal their magic for something I caused. We have to remember they had no car in this race if anything they were the only variable that could possibly save your marriage.

One thing that should be a constant is Santa . Santa should always come to the same place. Kids have in their mind that Santa is suppose to come to the same place every year, so do not switch that up from year to year. This is one thing that should be the first compromise that you guys make together. It also should be understood that the other party be allowed to watch the children wake up with the sparkle in their eyes to find what Santa has left.

We are all adults if we are parents so lets act like it and make the holidays enjoyable even if we have experienced that horrible thing call divorce !