Everyday sayings that we would never expect to have a negative effect on children like "Good job!" actually do.
Below are just a few of the sayings that actually work against the intended meaning when it comes to children.
"Practice makes perfect"
This saying has some truth to it like the fact that if your child devotes time to a specific skill that he will undoubtedly become better but this can also cause your child to feel pressure. This saying teaches children that if he makes a mistake in something that he does he hasn't worked hard enough at it.
"You're okay"
Many people have the instinct of telling their child that they're okay if they hurt themselves but this teaches them to suppress their true feelings even when they're not okay. If your child is crying after being hurt they're not okay instead you should teach your child how to cope with their feelings.
"Don't talk to strangers."
The thought of your child possibly talking to someone they don't know that could hurt them is a scary thought but this saying can do more harm than good. If a person is unfamiliar to a child but he or she is nice they may no longer seem like a stranger to the child. This also makes children afraid to talk to people such as a police officer or a firefighter.
"No dessert unless you finish your food."
This saying takes away the value of the actual meal and hold dessert at a higher value. You can change this saying by just explaining that there is a sequence to the order of dinner and dessert by saying "We eat dinner first then we have dessert."
"Go sit down and read"
By making a child read after they've done something wrong or if they have too much time on their hands makes reading a punishment. If you constantly make reading the alternative after having bad behavior your child will never enjoy reading and will always carry a negative connotation with reading.
From now on think of the small sayings that you use everyday and how a child would internalize them before you say it.
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