1. Belgian parks just aren't any good.
2. And the countryside? Garbage.
3. Scenic canals?! No thanks!
4. A seamless mix of over a thousand years of excellent architecture? Hard pass, nerds!
5. The Magritte Museum always looks awful.
We get it! He painted skies! You're not cute, museum!
6. "Manneken Pis" is your national treasure?! Grow up, entire country!
7. But in addition to bad art, Belgians just don't have a good sense of humor.
8. Bicycles are inconvenient and ugly, but Belgium ~loves~ 'em for no reason at all.
9. Two different kinds of waffles? Just pick one, Belgium!
And yes, we know Belgian waffles aren't from Belgium or anything like Brussels or Liège waffles — stop reminding us.
10. Three official languages (Dutch, French, and German) are two too many for one country.
11. Mayonnaise is bad and does not belong on French fries.
12. Belgian chocolate is notoriously flavorless.
13. And the Belgians only have an extremely brief history of brewing boring beers that all taste the same.
Not Convinced? Welp, just so happens you can win a trip to Belgium at NewBelgium.com. And while you’re there, check out the Zealots of Zag film series. Zag On.
