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Which One Of Hannah's Exes Are You?

I'll regret this (like most of you) later.

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  1. What's your hair situation?

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    Dark. Long.
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    It is a curly, brown mane that covers my entire body.
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    The hair I have is blond. The beard I have is red.
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    Blond!
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    Brown. Shaggy.
  2. Do you play guitar?

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    Yes!
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    Yes!
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    Yes!
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    Yes!
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    Yes!
  3. What reason did you give for breaking up with Hannah?

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    A lot happened really fast and it wasn't what I wanted after all.
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    Hannah moved to Illinois.
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    I blamed Hannah for things that had nothing to do with her and took my anger out on her as a result. Then I realized I was being dumb and won Hannah back. Then I repeated this pattern every three months for two years.
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    Hannah focuses really intensely on her work and gets really selfish and mean when that happens.
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    Hannah left me!!
  4. Why did you REALLY break up with Hannah?

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    I will never be good enough for Hannah.
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    I will never be good enough for Hannah.
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    I will never be good enough for Hannah.
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    I will never be good enough for Hannah.
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    I will never be good enough for Hannah.
  5. How old was Hannah when you dated her?

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    15
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    16
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    17
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    18
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    19
  6. Did you date Hannah's friends?

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    No, but I met Hannah because she dated my friend.
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    I never did.
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    I dated Hannah's friends before Hannah.
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    I dated Hannah's friend after Hannah.
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    I was the friend Hannah dated.
  7. Did you say the fated three words to Hannah?

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    Nope!
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    I texted them constantly.
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    Yes, but I took them back.
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    Nah.
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    I didn't until she did.
  8. Do you still talk to Hannah?

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    We like each other's stuff on Facebook sometimes.
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    I text her to be polite when I think about it.
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    I tweet at her every so often.
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    We like each other's stuff on all social media and are chill in person.
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    I tried to contact her for years, but she ignored me. Now I like her pictures every once in a while.
  9. Does Hannah like that you still talk to her?

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    Yes, finally
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    She's coo with it
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    Eh
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    You could do it more tbh
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    Not even a little bit
  10. What did Hannah do after you broke up?

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    Angry ranted for days and immediately moved on.
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    Took a day to be sad, then put all of her energy into her work so you'd notice how cool she still was.
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    Found a really awful boy to hook up and slowly stopped talking to you.
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    Was just relieved (but made out with you one last time a few weeks later for fun).
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    Cried a lot and redownloaded Tinder.
  11. Are you going to take this quiz?

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    Wait, quiz? Hannah, what's going on?
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    Maybe? I'm a little afraid. But maybe.
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    Hannah? Whoa! Hey! What's up? How've you been?
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    Absolutely.
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    Yes, and then I'll text Hannah at 2AM to tell her either how much I still love her or how terrible she is. Or both!
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