back to top
Weddings

13 Responsibilities That Come With The Title Of "Best Man"

Just make the groom look good. And show up on time.

Posted on

So you've been asked to be the best man at a wedding...

instagram.com

Here's everything* you need to know.

instagram.com

*Best man responsibilities and duties may vary from group to group, so use this is a basic outline of what you might need to do. Your main responsibility as best man is to support the couple before, during, and after the wedding, meaning open communication is key. Talk to the groom, make sure he's good to go, and relay information to the other groomsmen and the guests.

1. Organize the bachelor party.

instagram.com

Make life easier on yourself and use Doodle to pick a date. If there are a lot of people attending, you can simplify decision-making by creating a survey in Google forms to see what activities they'd like to do, how much they are willing to spend, etc. And make sure everyone is aware of the cost upfront. For the most part, everything will be split among the attendants (excluding the groom) but the total cost per person should be addressed before anything is booked. Organizing a bachelor party can be a lot of work, so don't be afraid to delegate some of the planning to other groomsmen.

Use this time to get to know the other guys, if you don't already. After all, you'll be in charge of them on the day of the wedding, so it's probably wise to remember their names/faces.

2. Organize the suit fitting for the groomsmen.

instagram.com

It's usually up to the best man to help the groom coordinate what the groomsmen are wearing the day of the wedding. This can include helping him choose the suits/tuxedos or simply making sure all the groomsmen know what to wear and where to get it, or being the one to keep reminding them to get their suit tailored. And if there are out-of-town groomsmen, it might fall on the best man to pick up their outfit. Ask the groom what he needs and help him make sure everyone is on the same page.

3. Help out-of-town groomsmen with travel accommodations.

instagram.com

Your role as best man is to serve as a liaison between the groom and his groomsmen, so make sure everyone knows where they need to be. This may include helping arrange travel accommodations for out-of-town groomsmen: what airport to fly into, where to say, how to get to and from the airport, etc. Remind them that they'll likely need to arrive the day before the wedding for the rehearsal. And if it makes sense for a few out-of-town groomsmen to share a rental car or house for the weekend, help organize that.

4. Pay attention at the rehearsal.

instagram.com

First, make sure all of the groomsmen are aware of the schedule and show up to the rehearsal on time. During the rehearsal, you'll receive several instructions about how to enter the space and what to do once the ceremony begins. So pay attention!

The other groomsmen will be following your lead, so it's up to you to know when to stand, walk, and sit. It may seem like a lot but you'll go over it a few times, and most officiants offer very clear cues.

5. Make sure the other groomsmen are on time and ready.

instagram.com

Tracking down missing VIPs is stressful for everyone involved in a wedding, so don't be afraid to send everyone a reminder and follow up with them as the departure time gets closer.

If it's feasible, try to have all the groomsmen meet at one location before heading out, just to make sure there are no hiccups or wardrobe malfunctions before it's too late. While your main responsibility is the groom, it's also important to make sure his groomsmen look presentable. It's also helpful to have some snacks and water while everyone is getting ready to combat nerves/hunger/hangovers.

6. Help the groom get dressed.

instagram.com

OK, he probably doesn't need your help getting dressed, but it's important to be there, even if it's just to fix his tie. Plus, there will likely be some downtime before the ceremony, so it's up to you to make sure he's relaxed and comfortable. And if anything goes awry, you'll be there to help.

7. Do NOT get the groom wasted.

instagram.com

Drinking before the wedding is obviously acceptable, but moderation and hydration is key. There's nothing worse than a drunk groom or a best man who can't take the ceremony seriously. Yes, it's a celebratory event, but it's also one the groom needs to be coherent for, so take a shot or two and leave the bottle at the bar. (That goes for the night before too.)

8. Don't lose the rings.

instagram.com

The best man is often in charge of keeping one or both wedding rings until they are exchanged during the ceremony, so keep everything in a safe place and check every now and then to confirm you haven't lost them. It's also a good idea to try pulling them out of your pocket once or twice to ensure that you don't fumble or drop them when the time comes.

And this should go without saying, but do NOT put the rings on your finger before the wedding.

9. Collect any final payments.

instagram.com

More often than not, a couple has to pay (or at least tip) their officiant and other vendors the day of the wedding. Ask the couple if they need you to do this and remind them to bring the payments a few days before the wedding. If you ARE in charge of that, put the money in an envelope before handing it over.

10. Sign the marriage license.

instagram.com

At some point on the wedding day, you (along with the maid of honor and the newlyweds) will have to sign the marriage license, making the marriage official. This typically happens right after, so don't wander off once the couple says "I do." (And if the officiant doesn't bring it up during the rehearsal, go ahead and ask.)

11. Give a speech.

instagram.com

This is it. It's time for your speech. Keep it short (under two minutes) and be prepared. (That means writing it down and practicing what you're going to say in advance.) Remember to toast the couple, not just the person you're representing. And be happy! Everyone is there to celebrate, so your speech should reflect that. But don't stress yourself out over it; no one will know if you forget a line, so relax and speak from the heart.

12. Be available and hospitable.

instagram.com

At the reception, the couple's friends and family members will see you as a person who knows what's going on, so be prepared to act as host. If guests are confused, you should be the one to step up and let them know where to go and what to do. This isn't always necessary, but knowing the basic details and schedule can be helpful in stressful situations.

13. Hit the dance floor, photo booth, etc.

instagram.com

Being the best man for a friend is (possibly) a once-in-a-lifetime honor, so you should enjoy it. Absorb yourself in the wedding, socialize with everyone, and have fun. This will help other guests relax and have a great time too.

Every. Tasty. Video. EVER. The new Tasty app is here!

Dismiss