1. Step 1: Make sure there are cameras watching.
2. Step 2: Adjust fit to optimal comfort level while maintaining sultry eye contact.
3. Step 3: Continue adjusting until everyone forgets there’s a baseball game.
4. Step 4: Stand up and squeal in delight, because you’re wearing a hat goddammit.
5. Step 5: Continue standing. Bask in adoration.
6. *Results may vary.
- President Trump said he will skip the White House correspondents' dinner. On Friday, he called the media "the enemy of the people."