1.
hate when people say "if u think this is better than sex, u haven't had good sex!", like no, maybe you've just never had good lasagna, Carol
2.
that feelin of a warm Chinese on your lap when ur takin it home is what I imagine bringing home ur first born is like
3.
4.
saw a husband tonight trade his plate of food with his wife because she liked what he ordered better & that's the kind of marriage i want
5.
When you're in denial about your unhealthy eating habits
6.
DR: you have this disease ME: oh no DR: but you can cure it with a healthy diet and exercise ME: OH NO
7.
Uuh hell yeah I'm "obese"!!! O verweight B ecause E ating S oothes my E motional torment
8.
When you try to steal from your sister's gummy bears but she knows you too well...
9.
My mom be cutting up fruit & bringing it to me in my room without saying nothing. Thats when it hits me, nobody ever gonna love me this much
10.
11.
Can I have extra gluten please? Give me all of that juicy gluten
12.
13.
Eat before you start an argument with your boyfriend so that when he offers to buy you food in the middle of the fight you don't lose focus.
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15.
Genie: and for your third wish? Me slamming down my fork after finishing my second cheesecake: TAKE A WILD FUCKING GUESS BUDDY
16.
17.
Left hand is steering, the other is gripping your thigh
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20.
[first date] HER: So do you prefer cats or dogs? ME: *scanning the menu* I don't even see them on here. What page are you on?
21.
Me eating food from the fridge that i know was my siblings
22.
"your pizza will be there in 30-45 mins" *46 mins later* me on the phone with the pizza place: I just think it's really funny how
23.
24.
reminder that winnie the pooh wore a crop top w/ no panties and ate his fave food and loved himself and u can too