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You Guys, Eggnog Is Absolute Garbage

Why does it look like that?!

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Eggnog is a revolting holiday cocktail — NAUSEA INCARNATE, if you will. Here's why:

1. First of all, eggnog is made out of raw eggs and milk.

NatalieMaynor / Flickr / Via

2. To cover up this repulsive taste, even the lowfat kind is loaded with double the sugar content of soda.

Abraham Williams / Flickr / Via

3. The result is something that tastes like a runny, chemical custard.

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4. But TBH, eggnog's appearance itself should turn you off: Nothing should look like THIS in its undigested state.

NatalieMaynor / Flickr / Via

5. Or like a science project gone very, very wrong.

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6. Nor should it require the presence of alcohol to STERILIZE IT.

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7. No matter how hard you try to fancy it up, eggnog will always look like a cross between sour cream and curdled milk.

peppered jane / Flickr / Via

8. This time of year, there is nothing worse than a holiday party with eggnog as the only beverage option.

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9. ... Because it's impossible to have more than one cup without feeling sick from the overdose of milk fats, sugar, and booze-in-hiding.

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10. *Dies on the inside*

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11. And don't get me started on aged eggnog, aka LITERALLY old eggs.

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12. To top it all off, it bears a strong resemblance to mayonnaise, the other egg-based abomination.

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13. Look at this photo and tell me right now: is this a cup of mayo or eggnog? YOU CAN'T EVEN TELL THE DIFFERENCE.

Bill Wren / Flickr / Via

Say NO to eggnog this holiday season.

Warner Bros.


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