Whether you live with a friend, a coworker, or a random dorm room pairing, sharing a home with a roommate can be an ~interesting~ experience. And because I am very nosy, I love hearing people's roommate stories, both good and bad. So when u/chee-koo asked the people of Reddit to talk about their most interesting roommate, I simply had to check it out. Some of these stories are truly wild, and others warmed the cockles of my cold dead heart. Here are some of the most interesting roommates from the thread:
1."My roommate in college claimed he was involved with the mafia. He was constantly sweaty, very jumpy, and always had a lot of cash in his car. He was never around on the weekends, and I never saw him drink. Strangest of all, he never once slept in his room. He was always on the couch by the door. He eventually told me that it was because if someone ever broke in looking for him, he wanted 'them' to find him right away, so no one else would get hurt. I still don't know if he was telling the truth but nonetheless, I ALWAYS locked my bedroom door at night."
2."My first college roommate rarely did laundry and would 'borrow' my underwear — especially for dates — and return them unwashed. I told him in unequivocal terms to keep his hands off my stuff, but he'd borrow whatever he needed anyway."
3."I’m pretty sure I used to live with a Hobbit. Man was about 5'1", curly brown hair, constantly cheerful demeanor, and never wore shoes inside or out. He literally slept on the floor in what can only be explained as a nest of blankets. He also started a garden and encouraged me to eat his tomatoes all the time and would bring home samosas and other goodies, always giving me half just because. He and his wife had a dream of living off the grid in a tiny home on a truck. I hope he's doing well."
4."I taught a roommate how to boil water. Iced tea was the first thing, other than sandwiches and salads, that she had ever made."
5."One of my roommates used to sleepwalk and sleep talk almost every night. I was the only one who'd be awake whenever it would happen. I'd witness her cleaning our fridge, sealing our opened bag of chips, and quoting Shakespeare in her sleep. What made her go back to bed was me asking her to sleep. She'd look at me and close her eyes. Whenever I asked if she recalled any of it, the answer was always no."
6."My roommate stole all my clothes (despite her and her family being filthy rich). I would ask her if she took my clothes and she would say ‘no’ then post photos of her in them on her Facebook. The straw that broke the camel’s back was when I was doing my laundry and noticed a pair of jeans I hadn’t worn in a while. As I was looking at them, I noticed my underwear was inside them, but it was odd to me since I never take the two off at the same time. Then I looked at the underwear and noticed I wasn’t on my period. She legit stole my underwear and jeans, got her period in them, and put them back in my laundry hamper. I lost it. Bought a lock for my room and locked it every time I left, even to pee. Moved out shortly after and didn’t want to continue the friendship. Years later, I ran into her at a bar and couldn’t help but laugh because she was wearing my jacket."
7."I convinced my roommate to have sex with me. I broke it down presentation style. She thought about it for about an hour, we had a couple drinks, and the rest is history. Now we're married and have two kids."
8."My roommate once created a whole new life form by leaving beans in the fridge until they molded so bad they became pure white. Then she got mad when I threw it away because she was going to use it later."
9."My freshman year college roommate was a random pairing. This kid partied all night and slept all day (legit wouldn’t wake up until 5 p.m.). One time, he goes MIA for like a week. I call my mom because I’m not sure he’s even alive. She searches to see if he has been arrested. Before she can call me back, the cops are knocking at our door. Mom calls me back a few minutes later, and says he had been booked for robbery at a convenience store which was in our dorm building! He tried to hide in an air vent. He made the front page of the campus newspaper, was expelled, and I got the whole room to myself for the rest of the fall and spring semester."
10."I spent over a year falling asleep to angry, muffled, whisper-but-not-really arguments between my roomie and his girlfriend. Just muffled enough that I couldn't understand what the problem was, but they were clearly not happy together. So I'd just lie in bed wondering, What's my duty of care here? Like, they weren't violent with each other, and it wasn't like one person was terrorizing the other. It was just two young people in a consensual and mutual spiral of despair."
11."We met when we showed up for dorm room assignments our freshman year of college. Almost 50 years later, we're still the closest of friends. I recently attended his daughter's wedding. A grand affair, because he happens to be uber-wealthy. At one point I found myself choking up, and it wasn't for the bride and groom, it was for John and me. How far we've come from that first awkward handshake a half-century ago."
12."I used to live with two strippers. Needless to say, they weren't early risers. One Sunday morning, we get a knock at the front door. Jehova's Witnesses. So, K goes to the door, and invites them in for coffee. While buck naked. Needless to say, they left, quickly. And we never had missionaries at our door again."
13."I once had a roommate for about five years who was literally (not figuratively) a fucking genius and also an insanely good person. She built a 3D printer from scratch in our living room before 3D printers were a thing anyone could purchase, and she did it just for lolz. She even built a 'Hackintosh' for me because I needed more bandwidth/space/whatever than what Apple offered at the time. She also made traditional bagels from scratch at least once per quarter in our kitchen, and the best cheesecake I have ever tasted in my whole entire life (also from scratch). She is a unicorn and we are still the best of friends, though we no longer live together. I have absolutely no regrets. This Earth, universe, etc. doesn’t deserve her. Not sure what dimension does, honestly. I am just proud to call her friend."
14."I had a college roommate who was obsessed with CSI. She had a CSI pillow, sheets, and blankets. She refused to turn on any lights and kept all blinds shut. She hated light and would sigh loudly if I would turn the lights on to do anything. I went to college right around when you needed a college email to make a Facebook, and she would tell me that Facebook is how they spy on you. She said she would never have a MySpace or anything of the like. She might have been right on that one. And she would always say I was a sheep and that I would have my identity stolen by 'them.'"
15."My last two roommates were a married man and his side chick. We lived in a shared house and the man recommended his girlfriend to the landlords after another roommate left (I had no say in it). His wife lived and worked in Germany while we live in the US, so he easily got away with it. They were cool with me but it was very uncomfortable to watch, especially since I met his wife when she came to visit him (before I knew about the girlfriend). He was so much meaner to his wife too. He'd complain about her cooking and make her cry, but with the girlfriend, he was Mr. Nice and Mr. Helpful. I don't know if the girlfriend knew he had a wife or not."
16."My South Korean roommate in college played StarCraft welllll into the night. We're talking, like, I'd be getting up to go to class and he'd be logging off. It cured my insomnia. Listening to a game in a language I didn't understand was very soothing, apparently, and I went from taking three or four hours to fall asleep (if I would at all) to falling asleep within 30 seconds of laying my head down."
17."She made 'chicken stew' which consisted of unseasoned chicken boiled in an entire bottle of red wine vinaigrette dressing and nothing else. The whole place smelled like vinegar for weeks."
18."Had a roommate who liked to project the whole 'alpha male' vibe. Different girlfriend every weekend, always parading them through our apartment, lots of loud sex, constantly bragging about the quality of his sex life and how it made him a 'real man.' After around six months of that, I was grocery shopping in a nearby store when I ran into one of his weekend flings. Apparently, she remembered my face but couldn't place me. So she just asked, 'Where do I know you from? Work? Are you a client?' 'Nah, you dated my roommate.' Which led to the rather awkward revelation that she was an escort. They were ALL escorts. He'd been hiring sex workers every weekend since moving in. I had so many questions, but he moved out the next day. Apparently, I was an asshole and humiliated him by learning the truth. Or that's what he said, anyway."
19."A buddy of mine had a roommate that would freak out anytime someone used the microwave. To the point where he actually stole it from the kitchen. His logic was that anytime someone used it, 'MY BALLS TINGLE!!!!!!' He was out one day, so they tried to find the microwave. It was no where to be found. He moved out a couple months later and left the microwave in the middle of his room. No one knew where he'd hidden it or saw him bring it back in."
20."I once had a roommate who was so cheap that when they moved out they took half of the lightbulbs. Literally, per device. We had ceiling lamps with three bulbs. They took two from one, then one from the next."
21."She stole my bread. I said, 'So, what, did Casper take it?' because she denied it. She said, 'Well, actually I have been feeling like my stuff is going missing too, and I saw a shadow of a man but when I looked no one was there.' So she indeed tried to blame a ghost for stealing my food 😂."
Have you ever had a weird, wild, or especially interesting roommate? Tell me all about them in the comments!
