I Legally Changed My Name When I Got Married And Here’s What I Learned
Who knew there'd be so much confusion?
Hey there! I'm Mathew, and when I got married a few months ago, I changed my last name.
I thought a lot about the decision to become a Jedeikin (my husband's surname) before my wedding day, but honestly didn't realize what a gigantic pain doing so would become. It's a lengthy process, and, in hindsight, I realize that I should have probably done a little more research before walking down the aisle.
So here's what I learned about the not-as-common-as-it-used-to-be process of changing your name:
1. First and foremost, changing your name on your marriage application won’t automatically update it in the eyes of the government. You have to visit Social Security and the DMV. In person.
2. Then you have to change your name on every bank account, credit card, utility bill, email, etc. Which is incredibly daunting.
3. Almost every person you contact about changing your name will congratulate you on getting married, which is killer if receiving compliments makes you feel uncomfortable.
4. Customer service representatives often have no idea what to do. My name change seemed to confuse the hell out of people.
5. On numerous occasions, the process made me think of the D word…you know, the one that rhymes with schmivorce.
6. Twitter and Facebook will let you change your username, but Snapchat doesn’t.
I had to delete and re-create my Snapchat account, which does sound trivial, but I was bummed that I lost the few followers I actually had on Snapchat as a result of changing my name. Then I had to email or text my friends, asking them to accept my friend request so that we could get back to snapping.
7. Traveling can be complicated while you're in the middle of the process.
8. People are going to make assumptions about your relationship. In my case, people assumed that my spouse convinced me to take his last name.
9. The expenses add up.
10. Changing your name creates a lot of confusion, both professionally and personally.
11. It can add pressure to your relationship.
12. The process never seems to end.
Whenever I feel like I’m done, another place where I need to change my name comes up. College and high school records, voter registration, frequent flyer travel accounts. Somehow, I actually still have more things to change.