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    28 Dark Things You'll Want If You Never Really Left Your Goth Phase

    Pull those blackout curtains closed and light a black-flame candle, things are about to get dark.

    1. An anatomical sketch sure to look ~bloody~ good resting atop your overflowing plant shelves. Your plant parenthood lifestyle has made your home look a whole lot less morbid than you'd intended. This sketch is here to solve that problem. 

    vintage-inspired sketch design of an anatomical heart with flowers growing from the top arteries
    Urban Outfitters

    Promising review: "This photo with frame is so much more than I expected. The quality is well worth the money. This print is my favorite piece I own." —Jallen212

    Get it from Urban Outfitters for $19+ (available in five sizes and 14 frame colors). 

    2. A deck of occult tarot cards for giving you inspiration and guidance on your (intentionally dreary) future. 

    packaging with several tarot cards on display
    New Age Gifts

    Owner Amy Diaz Hollis runs this small biz from Galveston, Texas. The shop has everything to support your mystical and witchy ways, from divination cards to altar supplies. I'm a sucker for all the carved pocket stones, particularly this witchy pick

    Promising review: "I highly recommend this. The pictures are beautiful and the deck is absolutely gorgeous in person; the colors and artwork are amazing. I'm so happy with it. Tremendous thanks to the seller for such a quick delivery, wonderful product, and wonderful experience." —ShadowWolfG

    Get it from New Age Gifts on Etsy for $34.95.

    3. A spider print so stinkin' striking you just might swat it in fear when you see it on your side table. 

    inverted black and white illustration of the underside of a spider with a person's face on it

    This Society6-featured artist has 24 designs available for purchase as prints, textiles, decor, and more. The majority of the work is inspired by dark realism, and it's *all* gorgeous. 

    Promising review: "She is so talented and I love my beautiful print!" —Alannah C. 

    Get it from KimmyNSW on Society6 for $18.99+ (available in five sizes). 

    4. A PDF cross-stitch pattern for fans of true crime entertainment who have spent hours listening to murder investigation podcasts while washing the dishes, doing laundry, making dinner, etc. Pro tip: If your partner listens to crime shows while doing should probably offer to do more of them yourself. Sure, they love you, but you have no idea what they could do with that scrub brush. 

    blood dripping embroidered text that says 'til your unsolvable murder do us part
    Avocado Stitchery

    This small biz is located in Montreal, Canada, and run by owner Rosanna. Browse through the 143 cross-stitch-themed products. There are pop culture pieces, dark and dreary themes, and (my personal favorite) an electric love option. 

    Promising review: I haven't finished it yet but I'm in love. I can't wait to give it to my fiancé on our wedding day. =) The instructions are easy to follow and it's a great pattern." —Michael Iacovino 

    Get it from Avocado Stitchery on Etsy for $2.71 (originally $5.41).

    5. A vampire bat door knocker that'll let solicitors know *exactly* what they're getting themselves into if they try to bother you by knocking on your door. 

    hanging back door knocker on the front of a door

    Promising review: "I love this, it's very understated and sophisticated — the perfect accent to a door. It's a very detailed and heavy piece. It looks like an antique." —Alexis

    Get it from Wayfair for $36.90 (originally $43.90).

    6. Or a sculpture version that's gonna look lovely out in your yard, you know, if your definition of "lovely" happens to be what other people consider "terrifying." This thing might just scare away bugs AND nosey neighbors! 

    flat metal sculpture attached to a tree that looks like a hanging bat
    Uncommon Goods

    Promising review: "The product is cute and looks just as shown!" —ldak

    Get it from Uncommon Goods for $60.

    7. A Haunted Mansion Little Golden Book so you can initiate your kiddos into the wonderful world of paranormal entertainment, from the womb to the tomb.

    book cover with three ghosts in front of a mansion

    Promising review: "The Haunted Mansion being one of my favorite ride attractions, I knew I had to buy this book. It is so beautifully made! The illustrations are so beautiful and colorful. I love the story! I just wish the quality of the cover was a little better. I would recommend this to anyone who is a Disney fan!" —Tania

    Get it from Target for $5.99.

    8. A heart cross-body — a darn cute accessory for fashion-savvy folks who know black is the only color to be worn outdoors. 

    heart shaped bag with embroidered angel demon gal with barbed wire details

    This 5''x6'' bag is made of...wait for it...VEGAN leather! PS The strap is removable, so you can also use this as a clutch. 

    Valfré is a Latinx woman–owned business based in Los Angeles that has home goods and fashion products covered in their iconic, sassy illustrations. 

    Get it from Valfré for $30.

    9. A really rad skeleton throw to use while snuggling up with your scaredy-cat boo during the horror movie marathon you've tricked them into "enjoying" with you. 

    woven throw rug in black with tassels and two skeletons printed on the front
    Frankie Print Co.

    This darling Etsy shop, started by artist Diane, includes woven throw blankets, printable wall art, and pillows. This is a small business you don't want to miss!

    Promising review: "I absolutely love this blanket! The quality is amazing! I would definitely buy it again!" —Sarah Hensley

    Get it from Frankie Print Co. on Etsy for $79+ (available in three sizes).

    10. A pair of Victorian curtains that'll complement your grown-up-goth home with some dreadfully romantic details. Go ahead, draw those curtains. Daylight is vastly overrated. 

    Image of my sister-in-law's bedroom with the patterned curtains in black. They have an old, victorian pattern.
    A different window in her bedroom, also covered with the curtain
    Mallory Mower / BuzzFeed

    The photos above are from my BFF's apartment. She and I share a gaudy goth aesthetic and when we were hunting for curtains for her home she found these gems. Since then, she purchased a gold set for her living room. Both purchases have shown us that the shop's quality is top-notch and consistent. I highly recommend these! And FYI, Zen Creatives is a small business in Los Angeles!

    Promising review: "These curtains are just beautiful. The red is very vibrant, so much that all the light that goes through has a red tint! I love the ambience it gives the room. I'm gonna have to buy more of them for my home office." —ninickthedemon

    Get it from Zen Creative Designs on Etsy for $15+ (available in 28 colors and eight sizes).

    11. Dangerous Games To Play In The Dark, a frighteningly informational book for brave readers who want to know the rules, alleged results, and history of some of the most bone-chilling games of lore we humans have dared to play.

    book cover

    Promising review: "This is a magnificent work of supernatural art! I absolutely love this little book! I read a lot of books on supernatural, paranormal, and folklore subjects and this tiny tome is more fun than most stuff in my library. It’s got it all! It’s creepy, it’s spooky, it’s historical, it’s urban legend and magic all rolled into one. This is such a unique book that I recommend anyone and everyone who is into the occult or supernatural read this and keep it for reference. The author did her homework and cited her references and the history of each 'game.' The book is well written and so much fun to read. I bought it strictly for chills and thrills, never intending to play the games (but the fun is in MAYBE SOME DARK NIGHT I WILL), so I encourage anyone who wants a tantalizingly wicked nighttime read to get this book. You will be pleasantly creeped out." —SEB333

    Get it from Amazon for $11.70.

    12. A skull bath bomb so you can celebrate spooky season even while washing up.

    Hand with long fingernails holding skull bath bomb in bubble bath
    Natural Pure Honest

    Natural Pure Honest is located in Corolla, North Carolina, and (although owner Traci has stocked the shop with a handful of spooky stuff for our kooky souls) the shop specializes in lovely luxury skin and bath products. 

    Promising review: "This is awesome! They look great, they work great, and they are BIG! They shipped fast, as well! Great communication from seller." —Carey Holzman

    Get it from Natural Pure Honest on Etsy for $6 (available in seven colors).

    13. And a planchette option to go with it! 

    dark ouija planchette bar soap on lip of bath tub
    Coffin And Cauldron

    Along with being my number-one favorite-named Etsy shop, Coffin And Cauldron is also one of my favorite stops for creepy soaps! But that's not all you can find in this wild shop. You can ALSO get customized marionette dolls that are, and I mean this with the utmost level of adoration and respect, actual nightmares. Owner Miya runs her shop out of Austin, Texas. 

    Promising review: "I purchased this because I’m obsessed with scents and wanted to have some cute soaps for the Halloween season. This is so absolutely stunning, I don’t even want to use it!!" —Jennifer Grosso

    Get it from Coffin And Cauldron on Etsy for $7.

    14. A sweatshirt that'll let your date know right off the bat that your sense of humor is...dark. Here's hoping they don't ~ghost~ you after getting a look at your lewk. 

    model wearing a sweatshirt that says future ghost
    myself wearing the sweatshirt in a pumpkin patch
    Femfetti, Mallory Mower / BuzzFeed

    I got this sweatshirt in a large and I love the oversized, unisex look (pictured above, right). It's incredibly cozy and I was positively swarmed by kind compliments when I wore this while apple picking with fellow fall enthusiasts. 

    Go ahead and bookmark this small biz now, because it's one of the *very* best places to shop for gifts! Dig through the over 700 laugh-out-loud (and lovely) items available. There are notebooks, ornaments, outfits, aaaaand exactly 97 Halloween-themed products. You love to hear it. 

    Get it from Femfetti on Etsy for $28.50+ (available in unisex sizes S–5XL).

    15. A tin of lip (em)balm sure to keep your lips silky smooth, no formaldehyde needed. 

    small labeled tin of lip balm
    The Parlor Apothecary

    Small business owner Anna has a collection of antique-style grooming products that'd make any shelf in your home look suave and sophisticated. There's also an assortment of mourning jewelry that is, ahem, to die for. Pun *always* intended. BTW, the shop is located in Biddeford, Maine.

    Promising review: "I love it!! It makes my lips feel nice and smooth! It's definitely a must-have in my bag!" —mguerrero903

    Get it from The Parlor Apothecary on Etsy for $10.

    16. A My Chemical Romance Oxford pennant to proudly display front and center in your entryway, to tell your guests " The Black Parade."

    Two people holding up the banner in front of a magazine-covered bedroom wall
    Oxford Pennant

    This is 18"x24" and made with cut-and-sewn wool felt with a screen-printed design.

    Get it from Oxford Pennant for $60.