1.
He proposed and then left to work a shift at Footlocker
2.
Once you realise Number 10 were all drunk all of the time, 2020 starts to make more sense
3.
One for your next secret garden party... Boris x Usher - There 🍷🥴 Bit late because I wanted to give a non...nod to the Prince Andrew news :) #Boris #PrinceAndrew @Usher
4.
Molly Mae when the clocks go forward and there’s only 23 hours that day:
5.
i keep forgetting i’m in oxford man, i was walking w my bonnet and one guy asked why i’m wearing a shower cap
6.
Just to be clear I thought this was a work meeting, but I guess I can see how it looks
7.
Dove soap??? Did we not all grow up using this??????
8.
“Mate, you really need to apologise to Buckingham Palace” is the hungover text we all fear
9.
and light years away from a trophy https://t.co/gOaiLnQ1hQ
10.
Why do you think they call it ‘Downing Street’?
11.
A lot of people have been taking the mickey out of Michael Fabricant today, and I'm finding it all very puerile.
12.
I see your Nan's got a job at Talksport
13.
everything everywhere is actually free if u just pick it up and run https://t.co/NK29S2w5f4
14.
Always been obsessed with the creativity of the Eastenders biographies
15.
if ever you feel unsure of yourself remember that in 2006 fergie had a hit single called “london bridge” with a massive picture of tower bridge on the cover
16.
Newcastle aren’t messing about this January are they https://t.co/aCRVdJGX44
17.
This was edited like bohemian rhapsody (2018) https://t.co/mNot8fsRma
18.
The Queer Eye cast member who was cut for being “too harsh”
20.
No10 had more parties during the pandemic than I have had birthday parties in my lifetime
21.
How the fucks Danny dyer been on eastenders for 9 year, ma life is slipping through ma fingers like sand https://t.co/MDxftpsuUF
22.
i readjusted how i was holding my kindle and accidentally highlighted a word at random and a definition popped up. very stressed now that my kindle might think i don’t know what a fence is. i do
23.
They commissioned the Marble Arch Mound to hide the fucking empties
24.
I ask a group of 6-year-olds "Who should be the next prime minister?" They had some thoughts A THREAD
Thumbnail images credit: Jeff Kravitz / Getty Images.