1. When his body looked like an actual statue carved out of marble:
2. When he did this thing with his tongue:
3. When he was the best shirtless Santa you've ever seen in your whole life:
4. When he had the most beautiful ab profile you've ever laid eyes on:
Thank you, Jesus.
5. When he seductively sipped on some alcohol and you were like, "yes, I would like a drink. Thank you."
6. When he literally had the most perfect beard and hair situation and you wanted to freeze him in this moment forever:
7. This. When all of this happened.
8. When he tried calming us down about the fact that he'll never be ours 😔:
9. When he gave this coy smile and you started to have heart palpitations:
10. When this was his ~cuddling in bed~ look:
11. When he looked like one giant piece of hard-rock muscle and you straight up lost the ability to function:
12. When he giggled so sweetly that it made your insides melt:
13. When he was ~thug~ Jake G and you were here for all of it:
14. When his snarky smile made your knees quiver:
15. When he licked his lips and you weren't sure you knew how to breathe anymore:
16. When he stared at his lover and it was sexy as hell:
17. When you got to imagine what'd it'd be like to FaceTime his beautiful soul:
God bless you, Jake. 34 has never looked so good.
