10 Dumpster Fire Movies I'm Still In Awe And Shock Made It To Theaters

From bad to just straight up offensive.

This post contains offensive themes like anti-gay, anti-trans, and racist rhetoric from movies. Reader discretion is advised.

I have some serious questions for the studios that green-light movies — firstly, why? But most importantly, WHY!? Some movies deserve to stay on paper sometimes...

peacock / Via giphy.com

Let's see if you agree that these dumpster fires shouldn't exist, and how many have you actually seen?

1. Clifford (1994)

Orion Pictures

You will be forgiven if you thought I would start this list by bashing everyone's favorite big red dog. Well, don't worry, that is simply not the case. The Clifford I am talking about is the 1994 dark "comedy" starring Martin Short as a 10-year-old boy. Yeah, you read that right. Short was 44 years old when he took on this role. He plays a dinosaur-obsessed, mischief-making, rambunctious little brat obsessed with getting to a theme park and will take anyone down to get there. 

As awkward as it was, this casting choice is still watchable because Martin Short is a phenomenally watchable comedic actor. But still, it's just odd. Shorts age allows for Clifford to get into mishaps that would be even more outrageous if an actual 10-year-old boy was playing the role, but that makes you think, was any of this truly needed? It was a massive box office flop, but it has achieved somewhat of a cult status and has some favorable user reviews on IMDb. If you watch it, just go in with a very, VERY open mind!

2. Shallow Hal (2001)

20th Century Fox

Remember Shallow Hal? The "hilarious" Jack Black and Gwyneth Paltrow romp are about a man who is emotionally stunted, misogynistic, and, despite being a heavier-set dude, all about the fat shaming. After being hypnotized by Tony Robbins only to see people's "inner beauty," he falls for Paltrow, despite her being plus-sized and him being a jerk. 

The film is filled with fat jokes, usually at the love interest's expense; in her introductory scene, she flattens a metal chair — that's the level of humor we are discussing here. Now, despite all this, this film was a hit, and it was the film that propelled Jack Black into leading man stardom. It also allowed Paltrow to show off her "comedy" chops. It took home a decent amount at the box office, but it's still terrible. Sure, the actors can act, but the script, humor, and visuals (Jason Alexander's character has a tail) are so awful that it's not worth watching this film at all.

Now, in the years that have passed since this film hit theaters, the actors have spoken out about how terrible it was, but I am not that forgiving.

3. Stuck on You (2003)

20th Century Studios

Amazingly, this misguided "comedy" from the Farrelly brothers was another hit with many viewers. And, not surprisingly, this isn't the only Farrelly Brothers movie on this list (Shallow Hal is also one of them, and they had a hand in the disastrous Movie 43, which is further down this list). Now, for me, the only film they have put out with any kind of comedy potential is Dumb and Dumber, and I am not even really a big fan of that one. But I am not here to dismantle the comedy prowess of the Farrelly brothers — not entirely, but still, Stuck On You should never have graced the silver screen. It's just another example of "oh look at those 'freaks'" humor that ran rampant in the '90s and early 2000s. 

One of the conjoined twins wants to be an actor, so the other has to come along for the ride — such a trail-blazing plot, don't you think? It's offensive and morally abhorrent, but its worst crime is that it's not funny! It's humorless. I would say that Matt Damon would know better, but he broke up with Minnie Driver live on The Oprah Winfrey Show. Please heed my warning: do not watch Stuck On You unless it's a rage watch.

4. Soul Man (1986)

Balcor Film Investors

I can not believe I am about to bring up this cursed film, but we won't dwell here long. I should just let it fall into the vale of obscurity where it belongs, but SERIOUSLY, what were they thinking? Soul Man is the "hilarious" tale of a college student who takes tanning pills so he can pass as a POC student. Yeah...yeah, that's real. Please think of how many people this movie passed by: the writer who put pen to paper and created this, the studio execs who funded it, and the actors who starred in this dumpster fire! 

At any point, none of them thought, oh, we shouldn't be doing this. But no. Of course, this film features extensive black-face, racist jokes, and above all, a terrible script!

5. Freddie Got Fingered (2001)

20th Century Fox

Ahh, Freddie Got Fingered, another 2001 classic, featuring such hilarious scenes as Tom Green sexually assaulting a male horse, Tom Green playing a keyboard with sausages, Tom Green swinging a newborn baby around by its umbilical cord, and oh, Tom Green climbing inside a deceased Moose. And I almost forgot, the reason the film is called Freddie Got Fingered, Tom Green accuses his father of sexually assaulting his little (adult) brother...

So aside from the fact it's vulgar without a point and possibly one of the most unfunny things to put on camera, does it have any redeeming features? Short answer: NO. Long answer...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It isn't very good.

6. Movie 43 (2013)

Virgin Produced

Okay, how do I even begin talking about this dumpster fire? First, Movie 43 is an anthology movie split into 14 segments. There are two versions of the opening: one sets up the movie's following segments to be lousy movie pitches, and the other sets the details up to be some sort of media that can destroy the world.

I will be honest: I have seen this movie (unfortunately, I have seen all the films on this list at some point in my life), but I cannot, with whole-hearted honesty, say I remember the loose "plot" at all. Each segment was individually directed by some of the biggest names in the industry — Elizabeth Banks, Steven Brill, Steve Carr, Rusty Cundieff, James Duffy, Griffin Dunne, Patrik Forsberg, James Gunn, Bob Odenkirk, Brett Ratner, Will Graham, and Jonathan van Tulleken. It stars an ensemble cast that is led by Banks, Kristen Bell, Halle Berry, Gerard Butler, Anna Faris, Richard Gere, Terrence Howard, Hugh Jackman, Chris Pratt, Liev Schreiber, Emma Stone, Jason Sudeikis, and other big names who also appear in storylines not included in the film's theatrical release. One of its "hilarious"' segments is The Catch, which features Hugh Jackman as a man with chin testicles that he unceremoniously slaps into OSCAR WINNER Kate Winslet's face when he kisses her forehead.

Or maybe Home-Schooled would be your favorite, where Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts play the parents of a home-schooled child they vow to give the whole high-school experience to by bullying him, hazing him, excluding him from parties...his mother being his first kiss...his father professing romantic feelings for him, you know the usual. 

Or maybe you're a fan of The Proposition, where Anna Farris portrays a woman in a scat play, and when her fiancé (Chris Pratt) ends up getting run over and evacuating his bowels messily, she declares it the most beautiful thing she has seen and accepts his proposal... 

Another one includes OSCAR WINNER Hallie Berry getting a humorous breast enlargement — just pure "comedy" gold. I could go on; every single segment is worse than the last.

7. Tropic Thunder (2008)

DreamWorks Pictures

I can hear some of you now, but Kim, this is a satirical — look at Hollywood, it's supposed to be offensive to shock you, blah, blah, crap. To be that, it has to be wise, it has to be funny, it has to have a point. This does not. It's offensive from the start, with Ben Stiller's portrayal of his Oscar bait character Simple Jack, or would you prefer Robert Downy Jr in blackface? Is that funny to you? I still, to this day, do not understand why no one else seemed to find it offensive...or at least they weren't willing to stand up and say it.

I will be honest, I didn't make it to the end of this film. I bought it on DVD back in 2009/10. I would estimate about 20 minutes in, I was done. I gave it another 20 minutes and noped my way right out of there. In that 40 minutes of viewing, I think I laughed a total of zero times.

8. It's Pat (1994)

Touchstone Productions

So, let's not beat around the bush, It's Pat is anti-trans trash. Its whole shtick is that no one can confirm Pat's gender. Pat originated as an SNL character who perhaps should have just stayed there. It's Pat holds the record for not only the poorest reviewed SNL movie but also has the smallest box office takings, raking in an epically disappointing $60,822.00 against its $8 million budget — only screening in three locations and being pulled after its opening weekend. The whole misguided point of It's Pat is that self-acceptance and confidence matter; however, how the story tells this is genuinely terrible. 

The only thing this film has going for it is that it's only 80 minutes long; any longer, and I think I would have thrown in the towel. It hits every trope of bad comedy you can think of — overuse of double entendre when characters are guessing Pat's gender, Pat is painfully dumb and misunderstands almost every situation they are in, and they are also overbearing, whiny, and obnoxious. Pat has a partner, whose gender is also ambiguous, and a neighbor, Kyle, who is so obsessed with Pat's gender that they begin stalking them, breaking into their home, and chasing them. All to end with Pat's clothes being ripped off, revealing their gender to a cheering crowd (but not to the viewing audience or Kyle, much to his disappointment).

9. The Love Guru (2008)

Paramount Pictures

You must have known this was coming. Or has your brain wiped all knowledge of this film's existence? If so, your brain's done you a favor. So what does this film have going for it? Racism? Check. Misogyny? Check. Jokes about Justin Timberlake's larger-than-average trouser snake? Check (SERIOUSLY, what was the obsession with JT's manhood in the 2000s?). As many innuendos as possible to avoid saying penis to keep the film's PG-13 status? Check. Cruel jokes at the expense of others? Check. Any humorous content whatsoever? Big fat, nope!

The film centers around Mike Myers' character of Guru Pitka, a celebrity-obsessed guru desperate to overthrow Deepak Chopra as the number one guru in the world. To do this, he agrees to help the failing Canadian hockey team, the Toronto Maple Leafs. Things happen that I don't need to talk about. Justin Timberlake's character is a mean French-Canadian, equipped with a "French-Canadian" accent (his whole performance is embarrassing). It was rumored at the time that Myers didn't do any live-action films for around five years before The Love Guru because he was shopping the Guru Pitka character around comedy venues in his stand-up, testing out the character. The Love Guru was Mike Myers' return to the silver screen, but was it worth it? No is the answer you're looking for. This is the same man that gave the world Wayne's World, Shrek, and Austen Powers (I'm even a big fan of So I Married an Axe Murderer), but this is just so poor in comparison. 

10. And Brüno - 2009

Everyman Pictures

Finally, let's take a look at Sacha Baron Cohen. Bruno centered around the titular character, depicted as an air-headed Austrian fashionista searching for fame in the US. Along the way, Bruno's homosexuality is pushed to the front as the only plot point. This movie's representation of the LGBTQ+ community is like a compendium of all the things a bigoted 12-year-old boy might think he knows about gay people. This was at the same time when the term "gay" was often used in the English lexicon to refer to something as "bad" or "rubbish," when anti-gay bullying was even more prevalent.

Its most "memorable" moments are those where the movie is stressing how "absurd" or "revolting" gay people are, only giving more confidence to bigots in their assertion. This being one of Cohen's later satirical movies, it also feels like the world has caught on to his tricks, with most of his victims realizing pretty quickly that something is off; most people meet him with patience, and the movie just gives up on actual jokes. It also feels like Cohen felt the need to ramp up some of his schemes, pushing them to new, unfounded levels, such as appearing on a talk show with a primarily black audience, claiming to have adopted a Black baby, and having named him OJ.

So, there you have it. This is just scratching the surface of comedy movies that are so bad I can't believe they got made. But if you know of any others, drop them in the comments below so we can all get angry together!

HBO / Via giphy.com