1. A joke so funny that you laugh so much that you're scared a bit of wee might come out.
2. That you're weird.
3. That they always have your back.
4. Whether or not your outfit is on point.
5. That your parents invited them over for dinner – and you didn't get an invite.
6. Whether or not you genuinely stand a chance with the person you fancy.
7. That they're eating the last slice of pizza and there's nothing you can do about it.
8. To get your own damn cup of tea.
9. Whether or not you really did embarrass yourself last night.
And they'll come armed with a list of people you'll have to apologise to.
10. A good friend will tell you that if you stumble they will be there to help you get up again...
11. That you should get up out of their favourite spot on the sofa.
12. That they want to borrow your razor/toothbrush/other personal hygiene apparatus.
13. To straight up give them the money you owe them. Give it.
14. That you're not their best friend…
That you can have the last delicious piece of KFC from the Friendship Bucket.
JK – they're going to want that for themselves.