1. Watch an hour-long comedy special by the Whaboom guy
2. Chaperone a middle school dance
Sweat, bad music, lots of newly formed hormones... it honestly sounds like a nightmare to have to be the designated "adult" at one of these things. But if the options were to chaperone the Middleberry Halloween Dance or to sit and watch Bryan get engaged to Rachel... well, early 2000's Usher and mystery fruit punch don't sound as bad.
3. Have a staring contest with Jack
4. Go to an animal shelter and pet all of the dogs and then not adopt any of them
Getting to hang out with dogs is a gift. Adopting dogs in need is an even greater gift. Going to an animal shelter and giving sad dogs false hope that you are going to adopt them is so painful. Just look at their faces as you leave. The happiness just drains out of them... that is a punishment far worse than death. Even so, ruining a couple dogs' days is not as bad as sitting through the horror show of the After The Final Rose ceremony with Bryan and Rachel.
5. Have a first date in a weird balloon room with a creepy clown
6. Take a cold shower while drinking a warm glass of orange juice
Come on. This just sounds bad. Cold showers are bad enough, but add in the warm glass of OJ? Forget it. Showers are glorious things but this just might ruin them forever. But, if Bryan proposes to Rachel and she accepts, that would ruin television forever. So, we'll take the crap shower.
7. Rewatch the moment from Jojo's season where Derek cried a bunch after being sent home while a woman sang "Don't Cry For Me Argentina" in the background
8. Eat a bunch of messy chicken wings while wearing a full white outfit and then realize there aren't any paper towels and be sitting there thinking like, do I just ruin these pants or do I just hold my hands up like a surgeon preparing for an operation for the next hour
This one is pretty self-explanatory.