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Jimmies, sprinkles, and pickle popsicles

I tried to get chocolate sprinkles at Walmart. It would have been easier to find the Santa Claus. In a Temple. On Hanukkah. With the Easter Bunny.

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I had to go to Walmart the other day.To get a prescription filled.I hate Walmart.The store of the great unwashed.But it's the only place that ever has this one medicinethat I need every month.I had to wait half an hour, so I picked up some stuff that I needed.Paper towels, milk, and ice cream.I wanted chocolate jimmies. So I asked the sales lady where I could find them. She didn't speak English, So she didn't know what I meant.Understandable."Jimmies" is a local word for sprinkles.So I asked again, for "chocolate sprinkles".She took me to whipped cream.I laughed and repeated,"chocolate sprinkles".So she took me to strawberry syrup,So I said "NO - chocolate sprinkles", "chocolate sprinkles" Because if you say it twice,while shaking your head no, it makes it more understandable.This time though, I did pantomime -Shaking sprinkles onto an ice cream cream cone.She finally took me to another sales girl;who also barely spoke English.I asked her for chocolate sprinkles for ice cream, pantomiming it as I asked.She tried to send me to the craft department. I again explained what I wanted.But she told me to go to the craft aisle.So I ended up in the cake decorating aisle. Where the only food was those melting chocolate discsthat taste like soapy wax.I walked back to the front of the storeAnd tried the baking needs aisleNo luck. I saw another sales girl who sent me way down,to an end row, Where they had a displayof ice cream cones.There were no jimmies.I ran into another sales woman and explained that I had been playing Marco Polo all afternoon, Looking for jimmiesShe spoke EnglishAnd she understood me.She said:"well, Miss, we don't have everything!We're not a super Walmart!"Makes sense. Of course, I could buy : -a cigarette lighter the size of my arm-a motion detector toilet bowl light that "lights up your toilet with seven ambient colors for those middle of the night trips to the bathroom" -A bacon scented pillow or a -Pickle flavored popsicle. I just couldn't get jimmies.
Bakers Party Shop / Via bakerspartyshop.com

I had to go to Walmart the other day.

To get a prescription filled.

I hate Walmart.

The store of the great unwashed.

But it's the only place

that ever has this one medicine

that I need every month.

I had to wait half an hour,

so I picked up some stuff that I needed.

Paper towels, milk, and ice cream.

I wanted chocolate jimmies.

So I asked the sales lady

where I could find them.

She didn't speak English,

So she didn't know what I meant.

Understandable.

"Jimmies" is a local word for sprinkles.

So I asked again, for "chocolate sprinkles".

She took me to whipped cream.

I laughed and repeated,

"chocolate sprinkles".

So she took me to strawberry syrup,

So I said "NO - chocolate sprinkles", "chocolate sprinkles"

Because if you say it twice,

while shaking your head no,

it makes it more understandable.

This time though, I did pantomime -

Shaking sprinkles

onto an ice cream cream cone.

She finally took me to another sales girl;

who also barely spoke English.

I asked her for chocolate sprinkles for ice cream, pantomiming it as I asked.

She tried to send me to the craft department.

I again explained what I wanted.

But she told me to go to the craft aisle.

So I ended up in the cake decorating aisle.

Where the only food was

those melting chocolate discs

that taste like soapy wax.

I walked back to the front of the store

And tried the baking needs aisle

No luck.

I saw another sales girl

who sent me way down,

to an end row,

Where they had a display

of ice cream cones.

There were no jimmies.

I ran into another sales woman and

explained that I had been playing

Marco Polo all afternoon,

Looking for jimmies

She spoke English

And she understood me.

She said:

"well, Miss, we don't have everything!

We're not a super Walmart!"

Makes sense.

Of course, I could buy :

-a cigarette lighter the size of my arm

-a motion detector toilet bowl light that "lights up your toilet with seven ambient colors for those middle of the night trips to the bathroom"

-A bacon scented pillow

or a

-Pickle flavored popsicle.

I just couldn't get jimmies.

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