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But I Have Great Map Skills!

I went to school before technology. I had to learn to read a map. I don't know where any countries are. But I can show you on a map, how to get there.

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I always knew

my geography was hideous;

we weren't taught that in school.

We only had map skills.

I took geography in college,

which consisted

of knowing the capitals

of every country in the world,

which I memorized,

and promptly forgot

after every test.

I remember

going over the terrain,

because the teacher

spent a lot of time

talking about the devastation

that could occur

if a tsunami ever hit the

Bangladesh area.

Foreshadowing.

This was 1992.

And I only remember that

because she pronounced it "Bongladesh"

which sent me

into fits of hysterical laughter

every time she said it.

27 year old mature me.

Other than that

I know nothing.

My whole life

whenever I sit on the beach

and stare out at the ocean

toward England,

I've wondered

if someone in England

was sitting on their beach

staring out and looking at us.

And I thought that if I swam

straight across the ocean,

I'd meet that person

And we'd have

tea and crumpets.

Today I found out

that we're directly

across from Portugal!

I've been staring

at Portuguese people

and didn't even know it.

So, I've been staring

at someone

who doesnt speak

my language.

and would probably

serve me some Portuguese

fish dinner

that I don't even like.

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