1.You pull up to what already looks like a disappointingly boring townhouse in a run-of-the-mill suburban neighborhood.
2."Come in, make yourself at home!" your co-worker Tim chirps. You are seated in what appears to be a criminally mediocre living room and have to talk about "what's up."
3."Would you like something to drink?" "Sure." You soon regret these words, as you are saddled with a glass of flavorless water drawn from the tap.
4.Before you know it, you have accidentally agreed to a tour of the house, starting with some remarkably unexciting stairs.
5.You have to pretend to admire his home office, which, in reality, is pretty spectacularly lacking in appearance.
6."And this is where I sleep." For a second, you wonder if this is meant to be sexually charged, but one look at his unbelievably unimaginative bedroom and you know that nothing devious could ever occur here.
7.You excuse yourself to the bathroom, hoping to find solace in SOMETHING interesting. But alas, you have only an all-white color scheme to keep you company.
8.Your tour ends in the small and mind-bendingly plain kitchen, where Tim turns to "fix you up something nice."
9.For a second, your ears perk up. Could he be a hidden culinary talent? But you are quickly disappointed by a measly, torturously bland meal of Wheat Thins and cheese bits.
10.As you pick at your plate out of politeness, Tim pulls out a large knife and, with a pathetically quick blow, stabs and kills you.
11.He then buries your pale, lifeless body in a heinously undecorated backyard, perhaps the worst offense of all.
