Nifty·Posted on Sep 17, 2013The Most Bizarre Interior Paint Shade Names Of All TimeWhoever's in charge of naming paint colors — we need to talk.by Joanna BornsBuzzFeed StaffFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink Hugs & Kisses benjaminmoore.com "I want to paint my wall the color of a PDA." — no one Mayonnaise benjaminmoore.com 1. Squirt mayo on a sandwich. 2. Pause and think "Hey, this would look great on a wall." Potentially Purple behr.com You don't even know?! Dragons Blood benjaminmoore.com What is this? Painting your kitchen or Game of Thrones? Mermaid Net behr.com Best case scenario: Mermaids aren't real and you look like an idiot. Worst case scenario: You've killed a mermaid. Song of Summer behr.com Do Robin Thicke and Daft Punk have to get dragged into what color you're painting your wall? Bath Salts benjaminmoore.com Is this relaxing-me-time bath salts or eat-someone's-face bath salts? Because it's an important distinction. Lauren's Surprise sherwin-williams.com None of us know who Lauren is. Let's just hope her little "surprise" isn't something horrifying, whatever it is. Friendship behr.com Did you know that friendship has a color? Flamingo's Dream benjaminmoore.com The sad truth is, 0% of flamingos achieve their dreams. Salty Tear behr.com Interior design and crying: the ultimate combination. Practical Beige sherwin-williams.com Whoever chooses this color is R2P (Ready 2 Party). Whispering Peach behr.com If only peach would shut up for like two seconds. We can all hear you. Anonymous sherwin-williams.com Hey, people who name paint colors, this is allowed? Your boss was fine with this one? Emotional sherwin-williams.com Whitney Houston's 1987 hit "So Emotional" probably wasn't named after this orange color. Probably. Spirit Whisper behr.com Terrifying. Phantom Mist behr.com Also terrifying. Rave Red sherwin-williams.com Is this shade of red going to be sucking on a pacifier and throwing glow sticks around? Magic Potion benjaminmoore.com Maybe you just wanted to paint a wall, and now all of a sudden you're mixed up in the black arts and there's no turning back. Divine Pleasure behr.com Slowly backing away. New Age benjaminmoore.com Remember that store in the mall that sold incense and power crystals and went out of business? This paint color certainly does. Bagel behr.com Are you just naming paints after what you ate today? Nacho Cheese benjaminmoore.com But it's an elegant, Victorian nacho cheese. Centaur behr.com Wanna paint the wall like a man horse please. Obstinate Orange sherwin-williams.com All those other oranges are too compromising. Give me a strong-headed orange. I need a challenge. Seduction benjaminmoore.com Nothing says "seduction" like a bright purple room. Gray Area behr.com If "gray area" comes up in a conversation it's never, ever a good thing. St. Patty's Day benjaminmoore.com I'd like to make a room in my home reminiscent of green vomit. What color is that? Ah yes. Red Red Wine behr.com I'd like my wall to resemble that time at the party when UB40 comes on and everyone's too drunk to change it. Dream I Can Fly benjaminmoore.com We've all listened to the Space Jam soundtrack, but do you really want to base your interior decorating decisions on it? Lavender Secret benjaminmoore.com If you keep too many lavender secrets, someone's gonna get lavender hurt. Dinner Mint behr.com Ninety-nine percent of the time dinner mints suck. There are those rare occasions that you get an Andes mint. But those times can't possibly make up for a lifetime of starlight mint BS. Grandma's Sweater benjaminmoore.com Remember when Grandma wore that blue sweater? No? Well then GET OUT. Cheerful Whisper behr.com Have you ever whispered cheerfully? Pretend that you have. This is what color that is. Likeable Sand behr.com I want the color of sand, but only if it's a likable sand. Appletini behr.com Painting your wall this color will result in the same thing as ordering an appletini — regret. Frozen in Time benjaminmoore.com Like... cryogenically or... what? Subtle Touch behr.com Who's touching what now?