1.
The world is a cruel, cruel place. Except for these hash browns.
2.
No one else cares for you like these hash browns do.
3.
These hash browns think you're beautiful, just the way you are.
4.
These hash browns will never judge you.
5.
These hash browns believe you have the courage and spirit to accomplish your dreams.
6.
If you're broke, hash browns don't care.
7.
If you look awful, hash browns don't care.
8.
If you can't dance, hash browns really don't care.
9.
Will you ever meet anyone else this golden brown?
11.
This willing to smother themselves in cheese for you?
12.
These hash browns will keep your secrets.
13.
These hash browns won't creep up on any other biddies or bros.
14.
These hash browns would never, could never, betray you.
15.
PLUS SEX APPEAL. LOOK AT THIS. YOU WANT TO LOOK AWAY BUT YOU CAN'T IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.
16.
Hash browns have their priorities totally in order.
17.
When you're all alone without a friend in the world--hash browns are there.
18.
When your entire world is collapsing in on itself--hash browns are there.
19.
When you feel lost, like life just doesn't have any meaning--hash browns are there.
20.
When you're looking for the most ideal breakfast food--WHO IS THERE FOR YOU? WHO IS IT? YOU ANSWER ME.
21.
These hash browns didn't believe in soul mates until just now.
22.
Welcome to the rest of your life.
