Recently, I asked the BuzzFeed Community to share the prettiest lies they have ever told. Apparently, we are all walking around with our pants on fire.
The results are as petty as you imagine:
1. "One time, some girls scouts or a similar group were soliciting donations in front of a supermarket. One approached me, and I lied and said I didn’t have any cash. She then said they take credit cards."
2. "My ex and I had gone out of town for the weekend to a city having a big festival. We partied all weekend and had a ball. Then I saw his sister, and she asked how our trip was. I told her it was great, and she responded, 'Yeah, Joe told me how you guys went to Phantom of the Opera!' WTF? Who lies about that? A man who lies about EVERYTHING, that's who!"
3. "'Nope, sorry, looks like we can't replace the batteries for that toy!' —me, to my child, after having removed said batteries."
4. "Very minor, but sometimes, if I’m telling a story that involves a disagreement with someone over pop culture, I’ll say, 'I made a post online where I criticized some TV show. I don’t remember what the show was now.' The truth is I totally do remember what the show was, but it’s not relevant to the story, and I don’t want to get into another discussion with the person I’m currently talking to about why I don’t like this popular show when I’m just telling them a funny story about what happened after I criticized it online, so it’s just easier to say I don’t remember what the show was now."
5. "My little brother made me mad (I can’t remember why), so when my brother texted me to ask if it was my mom's birthday that day (it was), I told him it was the day before. The sheer panic got me through the day..."
"...Sorry, bro."
6. "When I was in middle school, I was doing a group project with a girl that I kept fighting with. I made sure to create the slideshow that we were working on. By creating that slideshow, I had access to change the document. So, when we were working on it, I would change her access to 'view only.' Then, she would get confused, try to get help, and have no idea what the hell was happening..."
"...Meanwhile, I’d just sit there and watch her spiral."
7. "I once told my high school bully that she didn't have period blood on the back of her skirt. Serves her right for cutting my hair off."
—nevl
8. "One time a Marines recruiter called me. I told him I was pregnant so he'd leave me alone, and he goes, 'Oh...umm…you could do it after?'”
9. "Three years after COVID, some places still required all food orders placed through their app. I’m not downloading your app! Even if I do have your app, I’m still not doing it. I want to order and pay at the register. So, I lie by saying I don’t have a smartphone and watch the wheels spin in their head."
10. "'I had a salad for lunch.' Actually, I had a burger for lunch. For the fourth day in a row from In-N-Out... with a shake."
11. "Liars don't have friends and aren't trusted to do simple stuff. So, who wants to be a liar?"
