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Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?

A cat-collar shirt, squeezable pea pod, and stripping sloth: How far can *you* get without buying something?

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We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales from the links on this page.
Jeff Barron / BuzzFeed

We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales from the links on this page.

Welcome to another edition of “Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?”

I am your host, Jeff. I’m back yet again this week for the second time in a row! The game is simple. Try to make it through this entire post without buying something.

Don’t plan to buy anything? That’s OK! Stay and enjoy my groanworthy jokes! I italicize each pun for maximum cringe.

Come up with a better pun? Post in the comments! I DO READ ALL THE COMMENTS!

DANGER! THERE MIGHT BE SOME PUNS AHEAD! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! GOOD LUCK, ALL! 😀

1. A shirt with a sleeping cat around the collar for adorning your neck in cute comfort.

Cat collar?! I hardly know her!Get it from Amazon for $18 (available in sizes S to XL and in more ~cattier~ colors, pink and navy).
amazon.com

Cat collar?! I hardly know her!

Get it from Amazon for $18 (available in sizes S to XL and in more ~cattier~ colors, pink and navy).

2. A neck support pillow to stop your head from flopping around while traveling.

So that sleeping won't be such a plane in the neck.Get it from Amazon for $19.
amazon.com

So that sleeping won't be such a plane in the neck.

Get it from Amazon for $19.

3. A seductive enamel pin your friends will want to steal from you.

With this you'll be a...Newman. Or newwoman. I don't know who you are on the internet.Get it from Amazon for $10.
amazon.com

With this you'll be a...Newman. Or newwoman. I don't know who you are on the internet.

Get it from Amazon for $10.

4. A USB flash drive that displays how much space is left on it.

You might say these USB puns...drive you crazy?Get it from Amazon for $15 (available in 16/32/64 GB).
amazon.com

You might say these USB puns...drive you crazy?

Get it from Amazon for $15 (available in 16/32/64 GB).

5. A stripping-sloth T-shirt to bewilder and intrigue you.

For when you get slothed on the weekends.Get it from Amazon for $25 (available in sizes S to 3XL).
amazon.com

For when you get slothed on the weekends.

Get it from Amazon for $25 (available in sizes S to 3XL).

6. A folding chair with an integrated cooler pouch to keep your Capri Suns at the perfect temperature.

amazon.com, WWO / Via amzn.to

It's literally a cool chair.

Get it from Amazon for $24 (available in black, gray, blue, and red).

7. Potato skewers that'll have your spuds baked and given an occupation.

I yam pretty sure potatoes can't hold jobs like these.Get them from Amazon for $7.
amazon.com

I yam pretty sure potatoes can't hold jobs like these.

Get them from Amazon for $7.

8. A shark mug with a cookie compartment to keep them warm.

etsy.com

I really have to hammer in these bite-sized pun.

Get it from LennyMud on Etsy for $16.

9. Shelves that'll turn your favorite books into hangable works of art.

Best to use books that will leave you hanging.Get them from Amazon $28.
amazon.com

Best to use books that will leave you hanging.

Get them from Amazon $28.

10. A sling toilet paper stand that can also hold your magazines and books.

Perfect for any living shit-uation.Get it from Amazon for $25.
amazon.com

Perfect for any living shit-uation.

Get it from Amazon for $25.

11. A squeezable edamame pea pod you can pop endlessly.

This is the pea-k of keychain toys.Get it from Amazon for $10.I did a whole post on things you can fidget with that you can find here.
amazon.com

This is the pea-k of keychain toys.

Get it from Amazon for $10.

I did a whole post on things you can fidget with that you can find here.

12. A hedgehog table brush that's bristlingly cute.

I don't see what the point is of it being hedgehog shaped, but I'm glad it is.Get it from Amazon for $14.
amazon.com

I don't see what the point is of it being hedgehog shaped, but I'm glad it is.

Get it from Amazon for $14.

13. A wood paper towel holder for making tearing off a single sheet easier.

It makes for a tearable experience.Get it from Amazon for $37.
amazon.com

It makes for a tearable experience.

Get it from Amazon for $37.

14. A narwhal night-light to spear you with cuteness.

Seems gnarly.Get it from Amazon for $17 (available in purple, pink, and white).
amazon.com

Seems gnarly.

Get it from Amazon for $17 (available in purple, pink, and white).

15. Cat-butt coasters that are nothing butt cute.

I've heard of rump roasts, but this is just ridiculous. Get them from BrenleyCreations on Etsy for $12.
etsy.com

I've heard of rump roasts, but this is just ridiculous.

Get them from BrenleyCreations on Etsy for $12.

16. A superhero bookend to save your novels from peril.

Keeps all your superhero graphic novels from flying off.Get it from Amazon for $29.
amazon.com

Keeps all your superhero graphic novels from flying off.

Get it from Amazon for $29.

17. A hot-dog-dog mug that's not subtle at all in its meaning.

But if you get two of them you might break the universe. It'll be a para-dachs.Get it from FourLetterWordCards on Etsy for $20.
etsy.com

But if you get two of them you might break the universe. It'll be a para-dachs.

Get it from FourLetterWordCards on Etsy for $20.

Here is where we part ways.

But there is always last week's edition that you can find here.

The best things at three price points