When You're Borderline Obsessive About Halloween

The spooki(b)est time of year.

So we all know that Halloween is one of the (if not arguably the) best times of year.

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In fact, it's very much a religious experience for you.

It transcends timelines. Halloween is not just October 31st. It is an entire season of ghoulish fun.

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As soon as the Halloween displays are put up in stores at the end of August, you know it has come.

Basically your entire year is spent in hibernation until the Halloween season arrives.

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Wake up, wonder if it's Halloween yet, realize it's not, go back to sleep, repeat.

But as soon as it IS here, you're prepared af.

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Been waiting all year for this.

You awaken from your slumber into the person you were truly meant to be.

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For the majority of the year society has believed you to be normal, perhaps even sweet. But that time is over.

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Time to give yourself over to the Halloween gods.

It's like someone's lit a match inside you. You're drawn to anything Halloween.

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For everyone else, Halloween is a time to dress up as someone they're not. For you, it's a chance to be yourself.

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Your true self. The one that hides deep inside. The one that would probably scare ~normal~ people.

You LOVE dressing up, and put a lot of thought and effort into your costumes. Sometimes they're planned months in advance.

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The more homemade, the better. It's a travesty showing up in a costume almost identical to someone else's.

You get defensive when people don't ~get~ your costume.

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*explains in detail to peasants*

And it frustrates you to no end when people put little to no effort in their costumes.

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I'm sorry Jim, I love you, but just put on a real damn costume.

Asking you to judge a costume contest is probably not a good idea.

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Obviously yours is the best. Those who disagree are wrong.

But that doesn't mean that you don't have an appreciation for all the other incredible costumes out there.

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Why can't we just all dress up every day?

Decorating for Halloween is also incredibly important to you.

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You know it's important to set the right atmosphere, so every piece of decor is carefully chosen and placed.

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Happy Halloween, amirite?

The perfect jack-o-lantern is a staple.

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The first time you carve a pumpkin is a rite of passage.

And if someone asks, "Isn't this is little much?" about your decorations, this is your response:

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You can never have enough Halloween decorations.

Everything tastes better when it's Halloween-themed.

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Sweet, salty, savoury; it's all better when it looks spooky.

And Halloween music is God's gift to man.

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*hears the creaky door intro to "Thriller" and immediately starts twitching*

Trick-or-treating is one of the greatest traditions ever established.

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But a big F U to those who give out garbage like fruit and raisins. Candy or nothing, got it?

But how is it fair that after a certain age it's deemed unacceptable to go trick-or-treating?

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Nobody is ever too old to dress up and eat candy.

Haunted houses give you life.

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The rush of adrenaline is what you breathe for.

And horror movies become so much better at Halloween.

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Although let's be honest, you watch horror movies all year 'round.

But you've been to so many haunted houses and watched so many horror movies, you've gotten too good at learning what to expect.

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As much as you still love them, you wish someone would come up with something that could still make you jump.

A lot of people think you take your love for the season way too far.

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For those people, you have two simple words:

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Duh?

You know Halloween is life. It is the air you breathe, the blood in your veins, and the very essence of your soul. When it arrives, you have no choice but to give yourself to this very special holiday.

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And on November 1st, although it is over, you know it just means you get to start preparing for next year's Halloween.

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Best get started!