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    I Just Watched "High School Musical" As An Adult, And Here Are 28 Questions I Need Answered

    There's a severe lack of backpacks in this movie.

    I have loved High School Musical ever since I was a little tiny child. So I thought I would watch it now, as a big grown-up, and see if there are any questions that need answering.

    Let's get right into it, shall we?

    1. What is this ski resort teen New Year's Eve party? It looks like there are seventh graders in attendance.

    An awkward teen party

    2. Troy and his dad are playing basketball elsewhere in the resort. They are soooooo sweaty and I don't understand it. But why does Troy say, "That's money?"

    Troy says, "That's money" and his dad says, "Sweet"

    3. What is Gabriella's tiny purse?

    Gabriella with an ugly small purse

    4. Soon, Gabriella and Troy sing a karaoke version of "Start of Something New", which means it's a real song in this world?!?! Huge news! That explains how they both know the rhythm! Maybe this was always obvious.

    Gabriella and Troy sing the lyrics on the karaoke monitor

    5. Somehow the championship game is two weeks after everyone gets back from winter break. But more importantly, why is Chad's embarrassingly bad burn of Sharpay treated like it's the funniest joke ever made?

    Chad says, "You know what, she probably spent the holidays the way she always does," Jason says, "What how's that," Chad says, "Shopping for mirrors" and everyone loves it

    6. Also why is Chad wearing three watches?

    Chad has three watches stacked on his wrist

    7. Why do only the nerd folk have backpacks?

    No one but Gabriella and Taylor has a backpack

    8. Okay we're into "Get'cha Head in the Game" now, and I'm really supposed to believe this guy's in high school?

    A 32-year-old man

    9. Wait. So we've had "Get'cha Head in the Game", but the after school detention that makes Chad and Troy miss basketball practice is the same day. How many practices do they have each day???

    Coach Bolton says, "Where's Troy and Chad"

    10. I've said it before and I'll say it again, why does Chad just always have a basketball with him?

    Chad holding a basketball in the school hallway

    11. How many students submit musicals to be performed? More than one at one school is baffling.

    Sharpay says, "I've been in 17 school productions, and how many times have your compositions been selected," and Kelsi says, "This would be the first"

    12. In "Stick to the Status Quo", where does skater (stoner) guy's cello come from? If it's just in the cafeteria, it can't be a secret that he plays cello.

    Cello guy doesn't have a cello, then he's standing with one, then he's playing it

    13. Like one single day after Troy and Gabriella audition for the musical, Chad says everything is falling apart. One day. Maybe calm down, Chad? To be fair to him, the whole school is suddenly embracing their hobbies for the first time.

    Chad says, "Our team is coming apart because of your singing thing"

    14. Why the hell does Ms. Darbus think it's appropriate for her to be in the boys locker room? That is not okay. Wait for Coach Bolton outside.

    Darbus walks in the boys locker room and boys who just came out of the shower freak out

    15. How was Sharpay allowed to paint her locker pink?

    Everyone else's locker is white, but Sharpay's is pink

    16. Troy, you tell Gabriella to call you "freaky callback boy", but do you really want that to be a thing you've said?

    Gabriella asks, "So you really wanna do the callbacks," and Troy says, "Hey, just call me freaky callback boy"

    17. To quote Jess Day from New Girl, what is this hat?

    Ryan wearing a weird, swirl-pattern hat

    18. Sharpay hears Gabriella singing in the bathroom, but she doesn't see Gabriella when she goes in to investigate? She looks right where Gabriella's standing!

    Gabriella is hiding against a wall, Sharpay looks directly at that spot and looks around, then leaves without seeing Gabriella

    19. I've also said this before and I will also say this again, but how does Troy not notice his teammates are filming him when he makes the whole speech about not caring about Gabriella or the musical?

    Troy doesn't notice his teammates are obviously filming him and he says, "She's just someone I met, alright, the singing thing is nothing," and Gabriella watches the footage

    20. "When There Was Me and You" is clearly sung by two different people. Do they think we don't know this?

    "Singing this big solo very much sung by two singers" written over Gabriella singing "Where There Was me and You"

    21. Why is there a giant poster of the basketball players in the school hallway?

    Gabriella sings in front of a poster of the basketball team with Troy front and center

    22. What's the difference between a jerk and a mean jerk?

    Taylor says, "We were worse than jerks because we were mean jerks"

    23. Gabriella and Troy make up and decide to do the callbacks with their friends' support. No qualms there, but when Troy is waiting for Gabriella, he checks the time on his watch-less wrist. What's going on there, Troy?

    Troy looking at his wrist, and there's no watch there

    24. On the day of the callbacks, the scholastic decathlon, and the "big game", Zeke bakes Gabriella and Taylor a "pi pie," but it's a cake?

    Gabriella and Taylor gasp as they look at the cake with "pi" on it while Zeke, Troy, Chad, and Jason smile behind them

    25. What is this code Taylor sends that makes the lights fritz in the gym and the decathlon room smell bad?

    Taylor clicks "send code" and the scoreboard in the gym stops working and something in the decathlon room starts smelling bad

    26. Gabriella and Troy arrive at the callbacks. At the start of "Breaking Free", Gabriella gets stage fright, so Troy starts the song instead. Does that mean Gabriella and Troy are singing each other's part the whole time? Maybe Troy just sang one of her lines, but I desperately need to know.

    Gabriella freezes up, so Troy sings, "We're soaring, flying"

    27. How does Chad think this is a remotely okay way to ask someone out? The disrespect! The hubris!

    Chad says, "So, you're going with me to the after party, right," Taylor asks, "Like on a date," and Chad says, "Oh, it must be your lucky day"

    28. I have a billion more questions, but I'll leave it at this. Why is Ryan not universally revered at this school for his talent? He's amazing.

    Ryan nailing his part of "We're All in This Together"