1.
My friend just admitted to me that when he was a kid he had a crush on Zoe Ball so when his mum was out the room he used to get his bum out and ‘show it to her’ when she was on TV. He was ‘four or five’ at the time. Tears streaming down my face.
2.
You have to beat this to watch Arctic Monkeys at Reading
3.
me: i’m just gonna switch the big light on for 1 minu- british gas:
4.
has it occurred to thomas that he might be the problem
5.
Welcome to Haringey Green Lanes
6.
[Rishi Sunak at a Woolworths] "a pick and some mix, please"
7.
one vegan sausage roll left in Greggs and the person in front of me has neon pink hair please pray for me
8.
For a split second I thought something had gone terribly, biblically wrong with my cat
9.
I’m obsessed with the ending of this episode of corrie
10.
People who are 22 https://t.co/OfKFbqjOWd
11.
https://t.co/1YiQStK2Vm
12.
Screaming
13.
Every now and then I just remember Mel Brooks’ reaction to the One Show.
14.
Why is this so funny
15.
supermarket self scanners are an interesting cultural phenomenon where everyone seems to have just universally decided that it’s polite to steal about 20% of your groceries but no more.
16.
when i go into aldi middle aisle i feel like a medieval king planning which scarce but precious items i should buy from a travelling merchant who’s come to court
17.
"You know we were talking earlier about Dostoevsky? Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky. Born 1821, died 1881…" https://t.co/GjwLgfODD3
18.
🚨 WE HAVE REACHED PEAK GUARDIAN 🚨
19.
If any non-Brits are wondering who Martin Lewis is, he started out as a dude looking for good deals on a consumer affairs program & now he's the last bastion of British civilisation.