The 15 Stages Of Diagnosing Yourself On The Internet

Because the internet doesn’t lie, right? RIGHT?!

1. Stage 1: Realizing that you’re starting to feel a little “under the weather.”

2. Stage 2: Typing your symptoms in the search bar while anxiously waiting for your fate to be decided.

3. Stage 3: Seeing the top of the diagnosis list and thinking you’re going to be a-okay! But then…

4. Stage 4: Making it to the bottom of the list…


6. Stage 6: Beginning to immediately experience symptoms you’re reading about, but didn’t feel before.

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7. Stage 7: Trying ANYTHING to take your mind off of your newfound troubles (with little to no success).

8. Stage 8: Overthinking every single worst-case scenario now that you have 8,000+ diseases.

9. Stage 9: Waking up in the middle of the night and your self-diagnosed fate immediately comes to mind.

10. Stage 10: The single second of clarity. Which always turns into…

11. Stage 11: The “let me check ONE MORE TIME” stage, where you discover a million more things you potentially have.

12. Stage 12: Repeating Stages 1-11 over… and over… and over again.

13. Stage 13: Taking the bold step of actually going to the doctor and trying to keep a positive attitude the entire way there.

14. Stage 14: Your doctor confirming that you’re in fact totally OK and to nevereverEVER self-diagnose yourself again.

15. Stage 15: The walk of relief out of the doctor’s office thinking “LOL I knew I was fine all along.” AKA RELIEF!

16. And with Get Covered Illinois, health care is now more affordable. Explore your coverage options and enroll before the March 31st deadline.

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