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Ten Rules Of Fashion According To Me

I have excellent taste. I always have. Don't bother arguing with me, just do as I say. Love xx

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DO wear heels as often as possible.

Christian Louboutin / Via

I don’t care how tall you are. I don't care if you broke both your fucking legs. They elevate any look, make your body look amazing & force you to strut like a supermodel. Just suck it up & do it.

DON'T wear active wear in everyday life.


Athletic silhouettes & textiles can be sleek & stylish but cut off tights and singlet tops just look tragic outside of the gym. Don't be that wanker. Also the act of wearing active wear when one is never actually active is so transparent. We can all see your fat ass.

DON'T wear thongs, ugg boots or crocs.


Thongs are permissible at the beach & ugg boots around the house but crocs are simply an abomination. The very sight of any of these 'shoes' outside of their proper place is enough to make me want to commit murder/suicide.

DON'T wear low slung/hipster jeans, pants or skirts.

It's tacky. It reeks of the early naughties in a bad way. It can also be a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen. Nobody wants to see your vagina. Just don't.

DON'T buy, wear or endorse anything peddled by the Kardashian/Jenner clan.

It really just shows that you are a lemming with poor taste, just like all the Kardashian/Jenners before they hired stylists to make them appear fashionable. Also the audacity of Kylie Jenner selling lipsticks is too much to bear. Girl never even used to have lips. Also, there is only one Kylie. #kylieminogue

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