Sometimes there's comfort in hearing other people's dating woes so you know to not take anything personally and that everyoneeeee is going through it. On that note, I came across this Reddit thread where u/MrNiceDudeFun asked "What is the hardest part of dating after 30?"
The thread had a variety of answers but before reading through the ones I included below, it's important to note that everyone's experiences are different and not to get discouraged from what people say. With that said, here's what people had to say:
1. "Realizing that the number of single parents is larger than you’d expect."
2. "Dating after 30 is like catching a city bus after midnight. There aren't as many, but they're faster."
3. "I have actually found dating after 30 to be a positive experience. Most people have a course or direction in life at this age. Also in my 20s, a date consisted of going to noisy bars and parties to get hammered. In my 30s we go on better trips because we have careers and decent credit cards. A date is more like going to a winery with fancy rooms and getting grown-up drunk while eating charcuterie boards. Also, the sex is great because the women know what they like and aren't afraid to show you."
4. "You sometimes pay for what their ex did to them."
5. "Some people have kids or want them soon. And there's emotional baggage to deal with."
6. "I've learned I prefer my own company."
7. "As a guy, I would say the options open up when you're 30 or older. By this point in life, you’ve had time to establish yourself and become relatively successful. The age range opens up quite a bit and more women are open to you."
8. "For me, it was finding someone who didn't have kids, and didn't want them. At that point in my life, I was (and still am) 100% sure I don't want kids. Finding a long-term partner who wants the same was pretty tough."
9. "Many people want 'high value' partners while having no value."
10. "You'd be surprised. You're intelligent enough to recognize a 'flaw' by some people's standards. That means you have some self-awareness. Let me tell you — that shit is in short supply these days. Put yourself out there. You'll have some leveling-up experiences, and in a very short time, none of it will really matter. Most dating people did when younger is a wasted effort because they all suck horribly at communicating."
11. "The days of just light fun dating are less common."
—u/ZLVe96
12. "Finding someone. You either have to be super open with your preferences or you’re not going to find anyone. Like even with similar interests — when you go down the road of politics, ethics, kids, and morals, it’s so hard to find someone that meshes with all of it."
13. "I got out of a long-term relationship last year at 33 and I've actually really enjoyed dating in my 30s. I've had good dates. People are way more forthright with their goals and desires and frankly, the sex is way better. Maybe I'm more comfortable with myself than I was in my 20s, and lord knows I'm way pickier. I'm also not looking to have kids or get married so I feel way less pressure to 'settle down.'"
14. "Everyone has their own life filled with work, sports, friends, hobbies, and household chores. They are available for a short 30-minute chat after 7 p.m., but not on Tuesdays or Fridays. During this weekend, they'll be out of town, and next weekend, an old high school friend will stay over. The weekend after that, they go on vacation. They wake up two hours before you do and go to bed three hours before you do. But other than that, they are looking for a long-term, serious relationship/s."
15. "Dates start to feel like job interviews. People around this age tend to have their shit together. If you've gotten used to being single, getting in a relationship feels like major sacrifices will be necessary (time, money, hobbies) People are quicker to decide not just because they know what they want but cause the stakes are higher too."
