1."Depending on the situation, oversharing. Sometimes you just have to put it all out there right away and if they don’t like it, you’re not wasting your time."
2."Being straightforward and open about how you feel about the other person."
3."Being excited to go on another date, immediately. Could be codependency — or it could be that you’re genuinely that interesting to her. Why wouldn’t I want to spend a lot of time with someone I like?"
4."Texting again right away. The whole 'act like you're too cool for them' thing is so stupid to me. If I had a great time with someone, of course I want to keep talking to them. That doesn't mean you should blow up their phone. But I also don't think you should intentionally hold back when you want to keep a conversation going."
5."Being 'bad' at dating in general. Dating and relationships have completely different skill sets. One requires timing and guarding your information and trying to show your best self and not being too weird and handling these various interested people. The other requires opening up and sharing your true self with just one person. Totally different skill sets. People who are terrible at dating might be just great at being in a relationship, ya know?"
6."Discussing life goals and future desires such as kids, marriage, work, or education within the first few dates. Some people think it's too heavy when just getting to know someone, but to me nothing is more freeing than knowing the expectations and goals the other person has set so we can both make an informed decision."
7."Being honest about issues like mental health problems. Most people see that as 'Get the hell away from me,' but I think it’s a sign of honesty, and the fact that they were willing to tell you means they’re probably pretty trusting and kind. Plus, you know what to expect in a relationship. (Granted, this isn’t always true and sometimes it’s done in an attempt to garner sympathy.)"
8."Oversharing their emotions. I am too weak in understanding people. So if someone is very expressive about how they feel, I'm all in."
9."If you can feel comfortable with them in silence, that's a green flag. You don't necessarily want the silence to be due to lack of mutual interest, but it is important that not every moment be filled with speaking."
10."Quick replies. As soon as I see a text, I respond. It doesn't matter who you are, if you've spent some time formulating some information you think is valuable for me to know, I'll be eager to receive it."
11.This may seem creepy to the general populace, but if someone tells me they don’t have social media I see that as a HUGE green flag. It usually means they’re less concerned about what their peers and society expects of them."
14."Being close with your mother. I knew a girl who made fun of me because I liked to go over to my mom’s house and hang out. She’s my mom. I love her. And she’s fucking rad so…yeah? 'Oh, you’re a mama’s boy!' People get this weird Norman Bates idea when a grown man doesn’t mind going over to see his mom who is excited to make chili for him and watch TV."
15."Lack of longterm relationships. Could mean a fear of commitment or could mean that they don't waste their time when they know it's not working."
17."Acknowledging the fucked up things they did in the past. This person is literally owning up to their faults and they know what they did was wrong. Yes, they did messed up things. They've also learned from them. So many people do shitty things and find ways to say, 'No, it's ok because...' A person who acknowledges their own shitty behavior is the kind of person who will realize when they are in the wrong, take responsibility, and make amends."
20."Not having many friends. It’s annoying if they have a huge social circle and you don’t. It’s like you’ll feel like a serial killer to them and when they hangout with their friends you will be alone."
21."Clinginess and getting attached quickly. I develop connections with the right people quickly and I hate it when I'm shunned or pushed away because I like them? Like...I'm not gonna stalk you, you just make me happier than most people?"
22."That they think about themselves and want to do things without you at times. This can be seen as a red flag in that they're not really into you. But a person having their own life, not being obsessed by yours, and allowing you to also have your own space and life is a green flag that this person is not an obsessive asshole."
23."Having a lot of sexual partners. Just because someone likes to fuck doesn’t mean they will cheat. They probably know what they like in bed."
24."Talking about your ex. Obviously if that's the only thing they talk about, that's an issue. But I'd like to know what kind of dating experiences they've had, what worked, and didn't work. I think it's healthy to discuss past relationships and it helps ensure you're on the same page in terms of where you are as a team. Also, the way they talk about their ex can be an indicator towards a lot of behaviors."
25."Watching porn. My roommate in college always says that she doesn’t allow her boyfriend to watch porn because she considers it cheating. I disagree. I love to watch porn, whether to just get off or because I’m bored. I don’t consider it cheating and I kind of think it can be healthy to some disagree."
26."Discussing the 'deal breakers' in a relationship. I think it is great if a person is upfront and honest about their deal breakers. If you will only date someone with a certain religion, or background, I think it's best to know right away."
28."Having friends of the opposite sex. As a woman I’m mildly suspicious of men who’s only female connections are their family."
29."Being 'jealous.' Obviously there's a fine line and you don't want someone controlling or possessive, but a complete lack of jealousy shows me that you don't even care."
