Yay! It's Jane time.
1. Let's see if I can get through the episode without crying! I am currently 0/3 on that front.
2. I wish Xo's cancer was like when Michael had a brother for a hot minute in season 1 and the writers forgot about him.
3. Wait but I thought Young Jane thought her dad was Jimmy Smits…4. Jane's green top in this scene is super cute
5. Aaaw Rafael remembering her book-iversary we stan a career supporting bae.
6. I was really hoping getting his memories back would mean no more slow talking from Michael. That' s disappointing.
7. Petra trying to figure out what to text JR is me trying to decide my UberEats order.
8. JANE ON A SCOOTER.
9. Jane frantically running toward/onto a Miami bus is a running theme on this show.
10. Magda aka the crusty zit that won't go away already.
11. Mateo is so cute and Xiomara is a damn hero for doing this Grandparent's Day thing.
12. OH Alba sweetie you are getting sprung by these Jorge letters and it hurts to watch.
13. Okay so Michael as we knew himis not completely back, doesn't like Cubanos and still talks like a prospector. But he's back to being a MENSCH.
14. Michael making a big claim! That he loves Jane! Oh man. It's happening. My heart is breaking.
15. And now she tells Rafael. And my heart breaks more.
16. This is where I make my weekly assertion that I honestly don't know how these people don't break down and cry in the fetal position because THIS IS TOO MUCH.
17. This tea nightmare looks a lot like Alice in Wonderland, the source of many of my own childhood nightmares.
18. Petra and legal troubles are the real endgame on this show.
19. Rogelio just read my damn mind. I also no longer feel comfortable expressing my opinion on this love triangle because My Nerves Literally Cannot Take The Stress.
20. "Jane. I could be dead." Petra channeling mothers everywhere with this text.
21. Petra making a bold statement about past and future and planting her flag on Team Rafael terrain. I wonder when Petra, Jane and Rafael are gonna explain their various past romantic entanglements to their kids. Seems like a fun conversation.
22. Getting drunk to make tough life decisions is certainly not something the Jane and Petra of four seasons ago would be doing. They've come so far! A friendship for the ages.
23. Hey Mailman dude, I'm pretty sure telling someone not to cry when they're close to tears is the best way to make sure they cry more. Not that I speak from experience or anything.
24. JR! HELLO I have missed you! You look great sweetie.
25. JR knows Petra is a brunette wink wink hot damn.
26. YES. Please get back together so my #Petramos loving heart can find some relief in all this drama.
27. DAMN ALBA LOOKING LIKE A SNACK. I always love when they let Ivonne Coll remind everyone that she was a Miss Universe contestant thank you very much.
28. This Xiomara and Mateo dance is so damn cute. Makes me want a grandkid. Not a kid. Just a grandkid.
29. Glad to see Mateo dressing like a mini Rafael. I've thought a lot about it and I'd best describe this style as "always ready for fancy brunch" and I fully support it.
30. NO XIOMARA WHY ARE YOU FAINTING IN THE PARKING LOT.
31. OH THAT WAS TOO CLOSE SHOW IT WAS TOO DAMN CLOSE STOP SCARING ME WITH XIOMARA PLEASE.
32. Wow I really just felt relief seeing Petra and JR strutting around The Marbella. JR was gone for too long. Never leave again please.
33. Xiomara please don't talk about chemo not working I literally cannot stand it.
34. Jesus Rafael has been through this all before and I hated it then and look at that I hate it now too.
35. "Waiting for you to pick Michael almost killed me" DAMN YOU JUSTIN BALDONI HERE COME MY TEARS.
36. Wait what! Rafael! What are you doing! This is not the move buddy! You can't just kick Jane out of your SHARED HOME. IN FRONT OF MATEO.
37. …Okay. I've processed this. I get that Rafael needs an answer from her, and tbh I think it's good that he is telling Jane the feelings he's been bottling up. But kicking Jane out like she did something wrong is A Bad Move.
38. In conclusion, I can't pick a team and I think Rafael should see a therapist.
39. What am I saying?? THEY ALL NEED THERAPY. MICHAEL HAS TWO PEOPLE LIVING INSIDE HIM. JANE IS NAVIGATING AN EMOTIONAL QUAGMIRE.
40. At least Petra is happy.
41. Update: I managed not to cry this week! Just teared up a bit but water did not exit my eyes and roll down my cheeks so I'm counting that as a victory.
I Need Answers
1. Did this show forget that Rogelio has an infant daughter? I know Michael mentioned the Michaelina thing but seriously 4 weeks and no Baby.
2. Will Rafael get the therapy he so clearly needs??
3. Can Petra's assistant Krishna come back? I miss her. Will gladly exchange Krishna for Magda.
4. Can we please check in on Luisa?!? At this point Bobby and his pies could have done anything with her.
Theories
To quote Rogelio, I no longer feel comfortable expressing my opinion. This show is stressing me out more than Game of Thrones.
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