Running back LeSean McCoy is pretty good at hitting the gaps in the O-line, accelerating in the open field, and stiff-arming the secondary.
Learning his teammates' names? That needs work.
Of course, "Mark" Barkley isn't bad as far as Weirdly Unintentional Nicknames go, but McCoy can surely do better.
"Who, Mick Foley? Great QB. He and Matt should have a fun time competing for the starting job."
"Best hands on the team? Jack Marlin, for sure. GREAT hands."
"Man, no one is better at left tackle than Justin Biebers. NO ONE."
"Really, really excited to have Ice Cream Topanga on our defensive line. Big get for us."
"Really, though, we need stability at the QB position. Of course, that leads us back to one man and one man in particular. Y'all know exactly who I'm talking about, so it seems superfluous to say his name aloud, but that would be ol' Bort McSlinkyLegs."