back to top
Community

Paint Majestic

The musings of Actor/ Artist and Writer ~ Eric Schettl

Posted on

There was a man who decided he was going to paint something majestic on the wall using only the feces he collected from the sewers. He didn't tell anyone his vision for he knew they would distract his heart from being able to see it clearly.

Weeks and weeks the man gathered human bile from the sewers below through a manhole he had broken into, and stored it in buckets, his room smelled awful because of it. He stumbled upon a great white wall in skid row and this is where he began.

Time passed as the man smeared the feces on the wall only to have it fall back on the ground below. People walked by and stared, some amused, some disgusted, some utterly confused. People started asking if he was alright and what he was doing but he knew he had to stay focused on his hearts vision or it would become clouded by the thoughts and opinions of those around.

He knew this was the only way to do it. At times however he was doubting himself harder than ever. He would see a little shit finally stick, but then fall off again, there were many times he wanted to give up, "just paint something with a brush like everyone else" he told himself "you don't have to do anything truly original or spectacular" every time he was about to quit he would shake the poop off his hands onto the filthy litter strewn sidewalk and sit on his bucket, but every time he did so he noticed that the color of the white had changed ever so slightly, like the fecal matter was starting to absorb into the wall. These moments kept him going.

Bucket after bucket he smeared on the wall as he started to notice the wall was becoming more and more yellow, and that the texture of it was becoming thicker, easier for the actual chunks to cling on to. He pressed on and pressed on as chunks would stay and fall away until one day he slammed his hand as hard as he could in pure rage against the wall, trying to push it over. He was so infuriated that he pressed with all his might into the wall as the rage turned to tears and he collapsed onto the ground. He cried and cried and yelled at God for him making it impossible to do what his heart told him he could and as he looked up to scream at the heavens he noticed something very strange indeed.

There were five radiant brown smudges stuck on the wall. His handprint of bowl movement was stuck there, as if magic, somehow clinging to the wall as if suspended in space and defying gravity. The man jumped up and with a leap of excitement announced to the world with a scream "the shit stuck! After 57 10 gallon buckets it stuck!" People all around gathered with amazement, this was the magic they had been looking for in their lives and it was right there in front of them. after a deep, heavy sigh, with hundreds beginning to gather around him, he began his masterpiece.

-Eric Schettl

This post was created by a member of BuzzFeed Community, where anyone can post awesome lists and creations. Learn more or post your buzz!

Every. Tasty. Video. EVER. The new Tasty app is here!

Dismiss