How To Properly Grocery Shop While You Day Drink

Grocery shopping is truly a religion requiring correct etiquette and balance. Enjoying a well-deserved afternoon of beer and also getting the unsweetened vanilla almond milk on your shopping list can in fact live in the same leisurely weekend afternoon, here is how.

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Step One:

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Create for yourself a space at your favorite bar as close to your desired grocer as possible.

Step Two:

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Make friends with your bartender If you don’t know them, you should really should, no relationship is more valuable.

Step Three:

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With no less than 1/3 of your beer left, cover with a coaster (the international I’m out smoking sign)

Step Four:

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Power walk to the store!

Step Five:

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Have a plan, know your isles and directions. Find that cornstarch, your beer is waiting!

Step Six:

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Checkout! Use a reusable shopping bag, particularly if you feel embarrassed with your grocery bags in a bar. (you will grow out of this)

Step Seven:

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Return quickly to your bar stool and decompress, you did it! Almond milk secured! This whole trip should take no more than a smoker's break. If you are very close with your bartender, and haven't pissed them off my disappearing for too long, ask them to store your perishables, you'd be surprised!

Cheers!

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Now enjoy an afternoon of Day Drinking, truly a wisdom that comes with age. Note: This method is best for 1-2 item bathroom length grocery trips. Don't waste space at that bar! And as always tip your bartender well!