Listen up, my witches and warlocks. Gather around my cauldron.
It's time we talked about something IMPORTANT. Something that has been ignored for FAR too long. Nay, SOMEONE who has been ignored.
Recently, I tweeted about an old childhood crush of mine. A seasonal Halloween favorite, if you will. That's right folks, I'm talking about Luke, the smoking hot goblin boy from Halloweentown.
tis the season to yet again announce that i am in love with this troll boy from the halloweentown franchise!!!!
I realize that in this tweet I called him a troll. But after checking the Halloweentown Wiki, I have confirmed that Mr. Luke is indeed a sexy GOBLIN. I am truly sorry to anyone I may have hurt with this thoughtless error.
I then discovered that I wasn't the only one who had ~feelings~ for Luke, AKA the original goblin bad boy with a secret heart of gold.
Luke was hot as a mortal AND as a goblin. Don't @ me. #Halloweentown
If you didn’t have a weird crush on Luke the goblin from Halloweentown 2 Kalabar’s Revenge you’re lying
But one sentiment seemed to pop up even more frequently than Luke's status as a regulation Halloween hottie...
...and that was the fact that Marnie Piper and Luke DIDN'T END UP TOGETHER.
Marnie and Luke from Halloweentown didn't end up together and that is the greatest injustice of my childhood
Low key depressed Luke & Marnie weren't endgame #Halloweentown
DEMANDS WERE MADE.
Okay but why hasn't @BuzzFeed written an article on why Marnie from Halloweentown should've ended up with Luke the… https://t.co/z7GQk7djKs
And guess what, citizens of Halloweentown and neighboring districts and dimensions?!?! I'm here to DELIVER. Here is why Marnie (of the Halloweentown Cromwells) should've ended up with Luke the goblin boy, AKA the people's champion.
1. He's HOT. I know I already said this, but to maintain the integrity of this list, I need to mention it again. Luke is running around that giant Jack O' Lantern lookin' like a SNACK.
2. He's got that bad boy charm and cocky quips.
Plus, the way Marnie sasses him right back.
3. His feelings for Marnie made him realize that he was on the wrong side. She made him a better person!!!
4. Oh yeah, and the tiny fact that he basically volunteered TO SACRIFICE HIMSELF FOR HER AND HER FAMILY.
5. He gets even HOTTER. He comes back in Halloweentown II: Kalabar's Revenge and he's totally grown into his goblin nose.
Hot as a human and hot as a goblin. This boy has RANGE.
Please explain why between Halloweentown 1 and 2 Luke manages to Longbottom. Goblin glow-up.
6. He's comfortable enough in his goblin masculinity to let Marnie take the lead. She's a badass witch who knows how to take charge, and he's ready to hop on the back of her broomstick and ride off into the sunset!
7. And Marnie doesn't care that Luke can't perform magic. All that matters is that he believes in her.
8. And last but not least, Luke (AKA actor Phillip Van Dyke) has aged like a fine wine.
Y'all remember Luke from Halloweentown??? This is him now, I'm shook
Imagine Marnie and this certified silver fox growing old together!! It hurts just to imagine.
And don't you even START with me about that Lucas Grabeel Return to Halloweentown romantic storyline. Get that EVIL away from me.
Luke and Marnie are endgame. They are spooky, seasonal relationship goals. This is the hill I will die on.
If your not tryna be like Marnie and Luke from Halloweentown then leave me alone
And that's all I have to say about that. Happy Halloween!
