Who Is The Hottest Disney DILF?

There can only be one.

Hello, and welcome to DILF Rankings: Disney Edition.

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For those of you unfamiliar with the word 'DILF', it's pretty simple: Dad I'd Like to Fuck.

Via giphy.com

My job here is also pretty simple - to rank your favorite Disney dads on a scale of one to DILF city. Let's begin!

Via thedisneydiva.com

10. Maurice from 'Beauty and the Beast'

Via giphy.com

Ranking: 1/10

Whose Daddy: Belle

Notes: Maurice isn't a bad guy, he really isn't. He also doesn't have a lot of hair. If you're wondering how his genetics made of half of Belle's, you aren't the only one.

9. The Sultan from 'Aladdin'

Via wifflegif.com

Ranking: 2/10

Whose Daddy: Jasmine

Notes: I'm not sure why Disney likes incredibly short men with incredibly long hair so much, but here we are. The sultan earns extra points for his impeccable taste in fashion, but don't ask me how Jasmine is related to him.

8. Fa Zhou from 'Mulan'

Via gifer.com

Ranking: 4/10

Whose Daddy: Mulan

Notes: Fa Zhou is a nice guy, but let's face it - we don't really know what's going on with his hair. And those eye bags rival my own on Monday morning, which is saying something. Even though he isn't a daddy, he's a good dad and, in his younger years, I'm sure he would've been ~something~. We were both thinking it.

7. King Fergus from 'Brave'

Via theodysseyonline.com

Ranking: 5/10

Whose Daddy: Merida

Notes: Maybe King Fergus isn't the most conventionally attractive guy, but you simply can't deny his charm. Not to mention the fact that he can eat an entire family's worth of chicken dinner in one sitting. After all, he has pretty big hands ;).

6. King Triton from 'The Little Mermaid'

Via giphy.com

Ranking: 6/10

Whose Daddy: Ariel

Notes: Triton may have a long white beard, but we can look past that. Or should I say below that. I guess swimming around all day is a bit of a workout.

5. Chief Tui from 'Moana'

Via reddit.com

Ranking: 7/10

Whose Daddy: Moana

Notes: Chief Tui was a real stunner in his youth (see above), and I could talk all day about that hair. In his adulthood, however, he made the decision to grow a circular beard - and I can't say I'm on board with that.

4. King Frederic from 'Tangled'

Via r-wong253249-sp.blogspot.com

Ranking: 7/10

Whose Daddy: Rapunzel

Notes: This one is definitely an upset... I don't know, maybe it's the eyes. Or maybe I'm just blown away by the fact that, for the first time, a Disney dad is actually pulling off facial hair. Either way, Frederic has made his way into the top five.

3. Lord Tremaine from 'Cinderella'

Via disney.wikia.com

Ranking: 8/10

Whose Daddy: Cinderella

Notes: Lord Tremaine is truly a mystery, but maybe that's why I like him so much. Well, that and the broad shoulders. And the dark hair. And the long eyelashes. And those gloves. I'll be honest, the only thing holding him back is whatever the hell his mustache is - classic Disney dad.

2. King Agnarr from 'Frozen'

Via movieweb.me

Ranking: 10/10

Whose Daddy: Elsa and Anna

Notes: With perfectly brushed hair, beautiful green eyes, and an impeccable jacket, King Agnarr is the only person in the history of the universe known to be able to pull off the Post Malone mustache (including Post Malone). I could write you a five paragraph persuasive essay about his eyebrows, but a picture's worth a thousand words.

1. James from 'The Princess and The Frog'

Via babble.com

Ranking: 1,000,000/10

Whose Daddy: Tiana

Notes: This right here, folks, is a textbook DILF. A true classic. A masterpiece. I mean, seriously, look at that smile. Those eyebrows. That borderline dad bod.

Via d15nyfreak.blogspot.com

Just look at him. See what I mean?

Via princess.disney.com

Call me when you find a better DILF, and I'll hang up. Because you would be wrong.