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12 "Facts" About Sex You Need To Stop Believing

PSA: Your first time is not meant to hurt.

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1. Myth: A woman's "first time" is meant to hurt.

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A woman's first-time might hurt if she's not turned on enough, if her partner is too rough, or if she's feeling anxious and tense. Also, while most women's hymens are worn away before their first times, it plays basically no role in discomfort during sex anyway.

2. Myth: You can tell when you (or someone else) have an STI.


Unfortunately, a quick peek with a mirror every now and then won't cut it. Lots of STIs don't have any signs or symptoms at all, and the only way to be sure you're clear is if you get tested.

3. Myth: Hymens "break" the first time a woman has sex.

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Nope. Hymens can't break. They're more like a door frame than a barrier. They're usually worn away by the time you're a teen thanks to things like exercise, and even walking, and if they weren't, you wouldn't be able to menstruate properly.

So, if women bleed during their first time, it's not their hymen "breaking" – it's probably vaginal tissue bleeding because of poor lubrication or roughness.

4. Myth: Taking PrEP means you don't have to use a condom.

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PrEP is a drug that significantly lowers the risk of becoming HIV positive and some people believe that if you take it, you no longer need to use a condom.

PrEP only reduces the risk of HIV infection, so it doesn't protect against other STDs like gonorrhoea or chlamydia, and it only works if taken daily. Using a condom and PrEP also reduces the risk of HIV even further, so it's a no-brainer.

5. Myth: Most women can orgasm just from vaginal sex.

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Most women need stimulation around their clitoris to orgasm, and that's totally normal. Around 70% of women can't orgasm just from vaginal sex. So if you want to orgasm during penetration, make sure that area gets some attention.

6. Myth: Using a condom "ruins" sex.

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Can't feel anything when wearing a condom? This is most likely because you're wearing the wrong size and there isn't enough lubrication. Finding the right fit will drastically improve your experience.

7. Myth: Vaginas get looser the more a woman has sex.

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"A locked up, squeezed up, shut-down vagina is a tense, non-aroused one, not a virginal one." When women are turned on and relaxed, their vaginal muscles loosen slightly, and tighten again after sex.

Or, put another way, if giving birth to a baby doesn't permanently change the shape of a vagina, neither will a penis.

9. Myth: Virginity only involves a penis and a vagina.

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There isn't one solid, exact definition of what "sex" is. Most of us grew up thinking losing your virginity only involved PIV sex, but this is a really heterocentric view that excludes a lot of people's realities and experiences.

The truth is, "virginity" has different meanings to different people and only you get to say when you've "lost it" or not.

10. Myth: You only need to use condoms for penetration.

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You can get STIs from oral sex, so make sure to get regularly tested, and to use condoms or dental dams – whether you're giving or receiving.

You can also get STIs from sex toys, so putting condoms on them reduces the risk of you catching something (and can make them last longer).

11. Myth: Women should pee before sex to avoid UTIs.

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It's true, high school lied to us. Peeing before sex is the number one cause of honeymoon cystitis. You should wait to pee after sex because a strong pee stream increases the chances of pushing vaginal bacteria back out.

12. Myth: Older people never have sex.

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Your gramps are totally doing it. Studies show that 60% of men and 42% of women aged 65-74 are sexually active, though the frequency of sex reduces with age.

Basically, sex has no expiry date.

The more you know about sex, the more confident you feel. Take control of your sex life, and experience even more pleasure with Durex. After all, confidence is totally sexy.