Skip To Content

    23 Signs Your Jane Austen Addiction Is Getting Out Of Hand

    OK, so maybe you've lost touch with reality, but who needs reality when you've got Mr. Darcy?

    1. You're not British, but your interior monologue has a British accent.

    2. And you find ways to slip Regency lingo into everyday conversation.

    3. You've learned how to play at least some piano so that you too can be "genteel."

    4. You often lament that you "should have been born in the nineteenth century."

    5. You obsessively rewatch all of the adaptations, both modern and classic.

    And you know which one matches which.

    6. And have stood in front of the television trying to memorize their wicked complicated dances.

    It would be easier to figure out how they always end up with a different partner if you weren't practicing with your cat.

    7. You spend hours each day thinking about how you'd decorate your sprawling English manor.

    8. You wish you owned hundreds of old, leatherbound books whose yellow pages crumble to dust as you turn them.

    9. You've browsed online for a creepy, full-length night gown.

    10. You actually have an ink, quill, and wax seal set.

    And write long yourself.

    11. You find yourself impulse buying antique tea sets.

    12. You have tried to create an elegant updo and ended up looking like Medusa.

    13. You have seriously contemplated buying a bonnet.

    14. Studying abroad=England.

    15. You're inordinately attracted to men in vests and/or breeches.

    16. Or women in high-waisted dresses and/or petticoats.

    17. Your ideal man is a wealthy, emotionally-stunted snob.

    18. Preferably one who glowers at you intently from across a room.

    Nothing gets you going like a smoldering gaze from a floppy-haired brooder.

    19. You daydream about proudly spurning the proposals of several suitors.

    20. And of being pursued by two equally gorgeous gentlemen.

    21. This is your version of porn:

    22. And the absolute height of romance is stiff and complicated confessions of love.

    23. You live in a beautiful fantasy world in which everyone is polite and everything always ends well.