You pronounced "faux" like "fox" until a few years ago.
You sometimes wear glasses with fake lenses.
You have a dolphin tattoo... somewhere.
You have to make space on your phone every week for the amount of selfies you take.
You place all unwanted grocery items back in a random aisle instead of where they came from.
You basically returned every single present you've ever received to get something you actually want.
You're the reason there is a "Don't Eat Anyone Else's Food Without Asking" sign on the fridge at work.
You've turned a pimple into a beauty mark by covering it with eyeliner.
You took a cab for only five blocks yesterday.
You ate a slice of pizza after it fell on your kitchen floor last Saturday.
You've peed in basically every shower you've ever taken.
You've gotten spray tan abs more than you'd like to admit.
You always have to look up how many Rs and Ss are in the word "embarrassing."
And, as long as we are being honest here, you don't really know how Congress works.