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Who Should UWSP Theatre And Dance Department Hire For An Open Position?

Turns out we're getting a new professor! Take this quiz to decide who it should be!

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  1. What's the most important quality of a university professor?

    Working Hard to Get the Job Done
    Willingness to Collaborate
    A Friendly Disposition
    Plays the Piano
  2. What should a professor desire most?

    To create excellent art and opportunities for all.
    To guide students in the direction most suitable for their wants and needs.
    To foster a tight-knit community of artists in a safe learning environment.
    Typical salary range of $40-50K. Actual salary is based on years of experience.
  3. What practical skills should a professor have?

    Playwriting
    Sound Design
    Directing
    Making sure you drink plenty of water and breathe correctly.
  4. What should a professor's favorite play be?

    Mars Lost
    How I Learned to Drive
    The Tempest
    Be Aggressive
  5. What should a professor's favorite thing about Stevens Point be?

    A fulfilling career.
    Thursday night karaoke at Pete's (right behind Jimmy Johns, buy one get one drinks for ladies.)
    Getting to pursue a wide variety of theatre endeavors and learn about all aspects of the arts.
    Where's Stevens Point?
  6. What kind of classes should a new professor teach?

    Dramaturgy
    Stagecraft
    The joys of acting
    How to sing for classes that require you to sing in order for you to sing.
  7. What should a professor's favorite flavor be?

    Salt
    Salt
    Salt
    Honey and lemon water
  8. What is your reaction to this quiz?

    It's satire.
    It's all in good fun.
    It's just a little salty and that's OK.
    I'm am shocked and appalled! There shall be no BA students in my classes!

Who Should UWSP Theatre And Dance Department Hire For An Open Position?

You got: Justin Spanbauer

He was once where you were: a student at UWSP. He knows what it's like to be in the trenches and fight the good fight.

Justin Spanbauer
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You got: Justin Spanbauer

Sure, he doesn't have an MFA, but does that really matter? He has life experience! And what does MFA even stand for? Probably Musicplayer For Afewstudents.

Justin Spanbauer
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You got: Outside Hire

Plays the piano well. Essential. Preferably someone from New York for credibility.

Outside Hire
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You got: Justin Spanbauer

Oldest in the department. Steve once said "God, he's old enough to be my drama teacher" and now he can be!

Justin Spanbauer
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