Community Contributor

Community

Find out not only which Emperor you are, but more importantly, how you will meet your grisly end! (Spoiler Alert: it will probably be at the hands of your nearest and dearest!)

You're The Emperor Of Rome: How Will You Be Assassinated?

You are now filthy rich, you control the most sophisticated Empire in the world, and if you play your cards right, you could become a God!

Your friends, your wife, your servants, your 10-year-old nephew - all of them are dreaming up creative ways to shuffle you off the mortal coil!

Pick a wife:

Pick a recreational activity:

Pick a Mistress:

Pick an enemy:

How do you deal with your enemies?

Should Rome be a Republic again?

Would you like some mushrooms?

Would you marry someone in your family?

You have been married to your faithful wife, Livia, for 51 years, and hold her up as an example to women all over the Empire. Too bad she spent those years slowly destroying everyone you love and scheming to make her own son, Tiberius, Emperor.   
You’re lying on your deathbed, too weak to move from months of ingesting poison, surreptitiously administered by your wife. Soon your only grandson will suffer a violent and drawn-out death at the hands of a centurion, and your back-stabbing wife and your step-son will inherit everything you spent your life creating. Ain’t love grand?  

Source: Tacitus, Annals 1.5-6. Cf. Suetonius, Life of Augustus, 99.

Augustus! Your wife of 50 years will slowly poison you

Your breathing has stopped. Your nephew, Gaius, heir to the throne, starts gathering friends and well-wishers and sets out on the business of ruling an Empire. But wait, you’re not actually dead yet. Your attendants tell Gaius that your strength and sight are returning to you! Isn’t that wonderful news? Apparently not. Gaius summons the captain of his guard and orders him: ‘smother the old man under a heap of blankets’. Now, trapped under your doona, as the captain of the guard slowly drains away your last breath, you realise that adopting your nephew was huge mistake.  
Sources: Tacitus, Annals 6.46-51. Suetonius, Life of Tiberius 73.

Tiberius! You will be smothered with your own blankets

At 29 years old, you are the youngest Emperor Rome has ever had. Now only three years into your reign, you have run into some pretty major difficulties. But never mind those – today you’re going to the theatre, and hanging with the actors backstage!  
Suddenly, your military tribune, Cornelius Sabinus, gives some sort of signal. As you look around to see what’s going on, Sabinus lands a punch right on the jaw. You collapse on the floor, and look up to find yourself surrounded by unfriendly faces. You are stabbed 30 times, and few of those are aimed right between the legs! Your attendants and your german bodyguards run over and try to help, but it’s much too late to save you!   
Source: Suetonius, Life of Caligula, 58-60.

Caligula! You will be stabbed in the penis at the theatre

You’ve never had much luck in love. After three failed marriages, you marry your niece, Agrippina, who has convinved you to adopt her son, Nero. Now you’re sitting down to your dinner, and she offers you a dish of mushrooms - your favourite! Suddenly you don’t feel so good. Everything is spinning. You wake up on the floor in a puddle of your own vomit. Your wife seems concerned, she offers you a bowl of porridge, something to help you regain your strength, but that’s only making things worse! It looks like the porridge is also poisoned! Your wife stands by your deathbed in tears and embraces your son, Brittanicus, who won't survive long after your premature death. Maybe you're just not cut out for this marriage thing...  
Sources: Suetonius, Life of Claudius, 45-6. Tacitus, Annals, 12.66-69. Suetonius, Life of Nero, 33-4.

Claudius! Your wife will poison your dinner

About BuzzFeed Community

Community Brand Guidelines

BuzzFeed Community

Sorry, this content is no longer supported.

BuzzFeed Community Guidelines

BuzzFeed Community Leaderboard

BuzzFeed News has breaking stories and original reporting on politics, world news, social media, viral trends, health, science, technology, entertainment, and LGBTQ issues.

All the best animals on the internet. The snuggle is real.

BuzzFeed has breaking news, vital journalism, quizzes, videos, celeb news, Tasty food videos, recipes, DIY hacks, and all the trending buzz you’ll want to share with your friends. Copyright BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.

BuzzFeed News | Breaking News | Original Reporting | News Analysis

Animal Pictures and Videos - Adorably from BuzzFeed

Name

Thanks for subscribing!

Stay up to date with our latest BuzzFeed video. Enter your email to subscribe!

Oops! Upload an image or add text to submit.

BuzzFeed has the hottest, most social content on the web. We feature breaking buzz and the kinds of things you'd want to pass along to your friends.

Browse links

You're The Emperor Of Rome: How Will You Be Assassinated?

Congratulations! You’re the Emperor of Rome.

The trouble is that now everyone is jealous of you...

Rather than living out the rest of your days anxiously awaiting your brutal murder, this quiz is here to relieve some of that existential dread.

You're The Emperor Of Rome: How Will You Be Assassinated?

Congratulations! You’re the Emperor of Rome.

The trouble is that now everyone is jealous of you...

Rather than living out the rest of your days anxiously awaiting your brutal murder, this quiz is here to relieve some of that existential dread.

Share This Article