1. "My life is monotonous. There's got to be more?"
HOW TO OVERCOME:
Monotony is easy to fix if you can find the courage to step outside of your comfort zone. That might mean a new hobby, new neighborhood, or new social group. It may mean a new job or a new city. The search itself can be exciting, and when you make that change, you'll feel less trapped. It's like Ben Franklin said: "Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning." Don't also forget that a certain element of challenge will help you appreciate the good things.
2. "I'm never going to meet someone I like enough to spend the rest of my life with."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
First off, let's keep in mind that attitudes toward "settling down" and marriage are changing dramatically. Your grandma probably thought it was insane your mother didn't birth a child until 30. Your great-grandparents wed at 16. TODAY, THINGS ARE DIFFERENT and changing. Focus on building the life YOU want. If and when you do meet someone, you'll make a better partner because you love your life.
3. "Everyone at work secretly thinks I'm incompetent."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
This feeling has a name: Impostor Syndrome. It's a recognized disorder that affects many people, especially successful people. The irony is that those suffering under this fear work harder and achieve more success as a result. So these feelings, in one sense, mean you're probably doing a great job. Read up on the symptoms. If you're still unhappy, you can seek professional help.
4. "I am not grown up. I'm the same immature person in my aging body."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
We've all heard age is just a number, and youth is a state of mind. Your youthful mentality is an asset. You're mentally flexible. You haven't made habits. You're energetic. You are very much in control of your destiny. Mark Twain said, "Good judgement is the result of experience and experience is the result of bad judgement." Mistakes will be made. Your only job is to learn from them. And you can always reach out to a relative, friend, or expert for help on the biggest questions.
5. "Oh god, oh god, my metabolism is slowing down."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
The decisions you make now majorly affect your health later in life. It's time to eat nutritiously and find a form of exercise you enjoy. This is not negotiable if you want to stay in shape. The good news is there are 10 bazillion healthy and delicious recipes for you on the web. You could start with a clean eating challenge and go from there. Try to find a form of fitness you enjoy. Volleyball? Running? Rock climbing? Why not try it all and then pick your favorite?
6. "I'll never find time to travel."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
It's NEVER too late. You just need to find the courage (and save the money) to drop off the map for a while. Working remotely or freelancing is one great solution to make the cost of travel less daunting. Many testimonials and solutions exist. Find your niche and go, go, go! And don't believe the rat race haters who tell you "you're sacrificing your career." Life is long, and yours will be all the more rich.
7. "How the HECK am I supposed to pay for a child... Kids are expensive!"
HOW TO OVERCOME:
Plan, plan, plan! Kids are expensive, but certain tax breaks and lifestyle changes (more diapers, less eating out) will mitigate these costs. If you're planning a family, make sure to supplement the baby books with financial planning books. Monetary security is so important but frequently overlooked.
8. "I don't think I ever want to have children. Will I regret this?"
HOW TO OVERCOME:
Many people don't want children, but the view is stigmatized. Research suggests, however, having children does make some people unhappy. If you don't want to have kids, that's OK. Surround yourself with people who respect your position on the subject. Lastly, you can always consider freezing your eggs or sperm — and adoption is always a great option too!
9. "I will never be able to afford to retire."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
Some would say financial independence is the only "requirement" of true adulthood. Saving for retirement is part of this responsibility. If your company offers retirement options, educate yourself and take advantage. Otherwise, open a retirement account that fits your needs. Use a calculator to determine what you need to save. The bottom line is you need to live below your means. Learn this lesson now: Spending money will not make you happy, but saving money (and feeling secure) might!
10. "My parents are getting older. What am I going to do?!"
HOW TO OVERCOME:
TALK to your parents and make a plan for your shared future. Change is scary, age is scary, but when you make a plan, you will feel more in command of your destiny. There are resources available to help you start the conversation.
11. "It's too late to achieve my dreams."
HOW TO OVERCOME:
If you're having this fear, talk to someone who is 10 or 20 years older than you. They will assure you that you have PLENTY of time to accomplish anything you want. The time is now! Carpe diem! Make a plan and then make your dreams a reality!
Adulting is hard. Choosing a car doesn't need to be.
