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The Definitive Ranking Of "Hollyoaks'" Best Deaths

Basically, never attend a Hollyoaks wedding if you value your life.

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11. Lynsey Nolan: death by asphyxiation.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

In one of Hollyoaks most shocking whodunnit plots, Lynsey was found dead with absolutely no trace of her killer.

For months, suspects pointed the finger at one another, but eventually it was revealed that evil medic Dr Browning had committed the crime to protect Mercedes McQueen from being sent to prison.

Dr Browning got his comeuppance though when Mercedes ends up battering him to death with a shovel. Good riddance!

10. Sarah Barnes: death by faulty parachute.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

A jealous Lydia tampers with Zoe's parachute, but in the mix up, Sarah picks up the faulty one and falls to her death instead of having a lovely time skydiving.

Death by faulty parachute due to lesbian love triangle? Definitely top 10 Hollyoaks death worthy.

9. Texas Longford: death by being pushed out of a window.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

Yep. On her wedding day. By her new husband, Will, who had guilt-tripped her into marrying him in the first place. Poor girl.

Being pushed out of a window, well, we've seen it before. Being pushed out of a window on your wedding day? That deserves a spot on our list.

8. Andy Holt: death by impalement.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

Andy was just pure evil – luring unsuspecting women into his bed by drugging them. So no wonder nobody shed a tear when he ran into a sharp pole and bled out.

This makes our list for the excellent grim and gory factor, but because no one liked him, it doesn't quite breach the top five.

7. Heidi Costello: death by serial killer father.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

Yep, you read that correctly. Silas Blissett, Hollyoaks' friendly neighbourhood serial killer, mistook his daughter for someone else wearing the same Catwoman costume, smacked her over the head with a brick, and strangled her to death.

Only on Hollyoaks folks.

6. Dylan Jenkins: death by the Gloved Hand Killer.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

We were all left devastated when troubled teen Dylan met his maker at the hands of the Gloved Hand Killer, Hollyoaks' latest serial killer who has multiple victims.

After getting caught up in an explosion after a police van crashed into Kim and Esther's car, he is admitted to hospital, where events soon took a sinister turn, and the killer delivers a lethal injection, killing Dylan in mere moments.

Our hearts wept as we watched Trevor desperately pleaded for his son to wake up, before realising he was dead.

5. Louise Summers: death by murderous husband.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

The Warren and Louise love story was tumultuous to say the least. But when we thought they would ride into the sunset happily ever after, Mandy decides to inform Louise of her affair with Warren, and hell hath no fury like a Hollyoaks woman scorned.

Louise plots to kill Warren on their wedding day, but when Warren discovers the gun and uncovers her plan, they argue, and Warren ends up murdering Louise.

High levels of intense drama means that Louise's death definitely deserves a spot in the top five. She gets bonus points for surviving a previous attempt on her life – she's basically winning the how-many-times-can-I-get-murdered game.

4. Maddie Morrison: death by flying minibus debris.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

When a minibus lost control after swerving out of the way to avoid hitting little Leah, it crashed into the wedding venue, causing chaos and destruction in its wake.

Perhaps the most dramatic death of the episode is that of Maddie Morrison, driver of the minibus who had just managed to escape from the wreck – she was splatted by flying debris from the bus after it exploded.

I mean, COME ON?! How unlikely was that?!

3. Calvin Valentine: death by scorned, pregnant lover.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

Oh Calvin, what a naughty boy you had been up until your demise. He had angered a lot of people who probably would have been lining up to pull that trigger, but the title of murderer goes to Theresa McQueen. Not only was she the cousin of his wife, Carmel, but she also decided to shoot him on his wedding day in the spur of the moment.

He was a bit of a dickhead though, so none of us really minded when he was offed.

2. Max Cunningham: death by being run over.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

The lovely Max was mowed down by evil Niall on his wedding day, saving the life of his little brother, Tom.

If you ever get an invite to a Hollyoaks wedding, RSVP "never in a million years" and burn the invitation.

This was perhaps one of the most heartbreaking moments in Hollyoaks history, with us all feeling all of the feels. We loved Max dearly, and must honour his passing in our list.

1. Carmel McQueen: death by train crash explosion.

Courtesy of Hollyoaks / Channel 4

Weddings in Hollyoaks should come with a warning hazard.

Beloved Carmel died sacrificing her life for that of her cousin Theresa's (and murderer of her husband, Calvin) from the clutches of Sonny (Calvin's brother). We all wept with the rest of the McQueens.

Hollyoaks has seen a lot of murders, explosions, crashes, and whodunnit's in the past 20 years – what mayhem will unfold next?

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