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We love that wonderful weirdo.
BuzzFeed Staff
BuzzFeed Staff Writer
Phoebe: Ummm, Phoebe Buffay.
Off screen: How do you spell that? So we can get it right.
Phoebe: Oh okay, it's P as in "Phoebe," H as in "hoebe," O as in "oebe," E as in "ebe," B as in "be be," and E as in "Ello there mate!"
Phoebe: Because the more I drink, the less there is for the kids to drink.
Phoebe: Now your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru, but the truth is she died and someday you will too.
Phoebe: Oh my god. You're rich.
Mike: No, my parents are rich.
Phoebe: Well, so? They gotta die someday.
Phoebe: Why do you want to kill yourself?
Earl: It's just that I have been working for 10 years now at this meaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows that I exist!
Phoebe: Chandler?
Ross: I do not love getting divorced.
Phoebe: Yes you do. This is your third divorce. You love divorce so much you're probably gonna marry it...and then it won't work out, so you're gonna have to divorce it. I'm so drunk.