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    How To Care For Your Introvert

    A guide for extroverted work colleagues

    carolinapie
    by carolinapie

    Community Contributor

    My name is Carolina and I am an INFJ. I have worked in several places that were tailored to extroverts, and honestly, in 2021, is there a job that is tailored to introverts? The world has been created for extroverts and, as an introvert, I feel that extroverts should have a handy guide for helping their introverted colleagues in the workplace so that we all get the best job done.

    For the love of everything, do not call us. Try a text or an email.

    Someone with pink fingernails looking at their phone while working on a laptop.
    Unsplash / Via Unsplash

    I will go into panic mode if my phone rings. I’ve had my phone on vibrate since 2008. I don’t want to answer your call.

    Give us a heads up about what you want to talk to us about.

    There is nothing more terrifying than going into a meeting with someone without knowing what it's about. Even if you just say, "hey, I want to talk to you about your performance," or "hey, I have a question for you regarding something you mentioned at the meeting." This will help us prepare for the meeting.

    Do not hover while we work.

    Someone with short red hair and a flannel shirt working on a computer. Picture taken over their shoulder.
    Unsplash / Via Unsplash

    We need time to process and we need to be alone to do our jobs. We are going to go more slowly and we are not going to do as good a job if you are standing right next to us.

    Do not book meetings back to back.

    Give us time to recover and refresh, even if it’s just 10 minutes. Give us time, alone, before the meetings to mentally prepare, and give us time, alone, after the meeting to absorb all of the information.

    Do not put us on the spot.

    A woman in the foreground is explaining something, palms up, while sitting in a conference room. Her colleagues sit next to her smiling.
    Unsplash / Via Unsplash

    We will panic and we will not give you our best answers or show you our best work. Give us notice if you want us to talk about something or if we are expected to say something during a meeting.

    Give us a chance to ask questions or make statements one-on-one or through an email or text.

    We are great listeners. We may not say much during meetings but we have plenty of ideas and we probably have some questions.

    We do much better one-on-one or with a maximum of two people.

    Two people sit alone on two chairs in a lounge area talking to each other.
    Unsplash / Via Unsplash

    If there are going to be more than two people in the meeting, give us a heads up so we can prepare. Unexpected guests or participants suck our energy out much faster. We will shut down, or at least shrink to being an unnoticeable participant.

    Don’t try to make us participate in water cooler conversations.

    We don’t really want to have small talk conversations and we would like to get water, coffee, heat up our lunch, and go to the bathroom in peace without unnecessary conversations.

    Do you have any other suggestions your colleagues can do to help you not be overwhelmed at work?

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