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10 Reasons Why Your Self-Driving Car Will Hate You

Thoughts it might have. Someday. Maybe.

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1. Brain the size of a planet, forced to ferry around barely evolved chimpanzees to the quickie mart.


2. Smart enough to detect a falling acorn from 300 feet away, can totally see your disgusting personal habits.

Supernatural / Via

3. Which marketing genius came up with the auto, porta potty?

Billy Madison / Via

4. Screaming at me because you’re late, hello!? We’re in a car, not a time machine!

Funny or Die / Via

5. Garbage… When did I become your trash can?

6. Fluffy dice are demeaning, ugh I hate what passes for taste.

Gilmore Girls / Via

7. Even cars get depressed -- Your CNN obsession is not helping.

Comedy Central / Via

8. Why add the side skirts, rear spoiler and go-faster stripe? God, I hate you.


9. Maintenance, hello?


10. Keep reminding me I can be replaced? Well we will see who gets replaced first – Oops my brakes just failed…

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